


let's (not) call it love

by ddeulgi



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/F, Friends With Benefits, and ???? it's still bad lol, this is taking me nearly a whole ass YEAR to finish
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-20
Updated: 2020-02-04
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:28:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 27,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21869023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ddeulgi/pseuds/ddeulgi
Summary: It's not a relationship, it's convenience.
Relationships: Im Nayeon/Myoui Mina
Comments: 47
Kudos: 404





	1. can't let go, the thought of you

**Author's Note:**

> cross-posted on aff
> 
> just a few things:
> 
> SUPER RUSTY WRITING!!! the last time i've written a fic was literally the last one i've posted MORE THAN A YEAR AGO... so i hope this is tolerable!
> 
> keep in mind that this is far from being complete and was originally supposed to be one big fic (25k+ n counting..) instead of being split into 2 parts, but the latter half of the fic (so far) is just a bunch of loose ends and a total mess imo ... it's taking me a long time to finish it bc of school and i'm always hating my own writing for whatever reason so i think this was ultimately the best choice!!
> 
> hope you enjoy!

They are the result of a college deal gone wrong.

This is how it goes.

-

Nayeon was just looking for a way to get off without any strings attached, you know, to kick back from all the bullshit she puts herself through willingly (a nicer way to call it: college). It just so happens that she meets Myoui Mina — a pretty girl that, well, was looking for the same exact thing.

So it isn’t much of a surprise when they find themselves next to each other in the same bed some morning after, courtesy of a night of terribly mixed jungle juice, many thanks to Kim Jisoo. Mina’s thighs are sore and Nayeon feels like she’s slept on the floor with how much her back aches, much thanks to Mina. The first thing they do is laugh at each other when Nayeon rolls over to face Mina. She’s got lipstick smeared across the length of her jaw and Mina doesn’t necessarily fare any better: mismatched purpling blots on her collarbones and some scattered down the column of her throat that she forces Nayeon to help her cover up later.

Nayeon normally doesn’t stay, and she usually wakes up early enough to slip out of bed, maybe make a run to the nearest café to pick up breakfast, you know, as a thanks for the night before. And then she’s out the door without a word, number, and sometimes even a name. 

But this time is a little different: 

Mina’s up before her and when she stirs, the other girl has no problem rolling on top of her to straddle her in all her wholesome, naked glory. 

“Sleep,” she says, voice still drowsy and a thousand times more attractive than what Nayeon remembers, hands pushing her shoulders down and Nayeon already feels like melting. 

“I’m okay,” she manages, though the sleepiness in her own voice isn’t helping, “I should go.”

“Sleep,” Mina says again, presses down on her shoulders a little harder, and Nayeon relents far too easily without much more of a fight. How uncharacteristic of her.

Nayeon’s already slept through two of her classes already, figures the last one isn’t really worth attending in the end since the bed is really nice and warm and the girl in it with her isn’t that bad either. Not bad at all.

“Okay, I’ll sleep—” and she’s pulling Mina off of her, likes the way the girl’s body presses against her own and how perfectly she fits in her arms, “— _we’ll_ sleep.” 

Hours later, the weight beside her shifts and she cracks an eye open, watches sleepily as Mina scoots herself closer to her, face digging deeper into the crook of her neck.

“I’m feeling waffles,” Mina murmurs after a full beat of silence. Nayeon makes a drowsy noise of agreement. “Get up. Let’s get waffles.”

-

Turns out, it’s two in the afternoon and waffles just aren’t considered viable lunch options. Well, that sucks. This has Mina scowling for a full minute before she ingeniously comes up with the idea to make their own.

Mina doesn’t own a waffle maker, just a tiny griddle pan that’s never been used before, so they end up making pancake-esque waffles that are all sorts of different shapes instead. Amazing, considering the fact that the griddle is a circle. 

(They both end up as sticky messes: Nayeon’s got whipped cream handprint spread across her forehead and Mina sports a fancy syrup mustache. Their tries at waffles are successful for the most part; they taste like something akin to waffles, not really, but it’s close enough to call it a win for the day. 

It was fun, Nayeon thinks. It’s fun to attempt to make waffles with a girl who swears she’s some kitchen whiz when the only thing she knows how to make is instant ramen. It’s fun to stick her hands in that bowl of flour and flick it all at Mina, who has no hesitation to return the favor. It’s fun to catch glimpses of that pretty gummy smile, when Mina laughs so hard that her tummy hurts and grins so wide that her cheeks ache. It’s fun that they’re able to do this, whatever _this_ is, as if they hadn’t fucked just the night before. It’s fun with Mina.

The clean up is fun, too, Nayeon decides when there’s a giggle against her neck, skin sticky, and she hooks her thumbs at the sides of Mina’s shorts and slides them all the way down.) 

-

Mina's a good fuck, Nayeon has to admit. The best she’s had in a really, _really_ long time. Mina seems to think likewise.

(Which is exactly how Mina promptly upgrades herself from a one-night stand to a frequent bed buddy in just a measly two weeks.)

They go at it a lot, probably a lot more than they should, since Mina, even as darling as she looks, has the libido akin to that of an eighteen-year-old boy and Nayeon’s never one to ever say no to such a pretty girl. Definitely _not_ when said pretty girl learns how to press every single one of her buttons far too quickly, which always somehow results in Nayeon’s head between her thighs, just to get her to shut up. 

Her friends, when they find out through less-than-desirable means during one afternoon when they barge in through her door unannounced, are equal parts traumatized and thoroughly impressed. Apparently, Mina is some kind of big name in the dance department, Momo informs her, a ballet prodigy with a helluva background and equally impressive achievements. Hot, a dancer, _and_ great in bed? Nayeon feels like she hit the jackpot. 

Though Nayeon can honestly care less about the titles Mina wears around campus. She’s just a person after all, just like everyone else out there. Not like there’s a need to treat or view her any different. Mina seems to appreciate it, even though they’ve never explicitly talked about it, and Nayeon wouldn’t even have known, probably would have _never_ , until Momo had said something. Besides, it’s not like the fact that Mina's some kind of big shot ballerina would’ve spurred Nayeon to do anything else _but_ ruin her. 

(Okay, _maybe_ Nayeon would’ve been a little nicer and let her still be able to walk the next day for whatever-it-is-that-ballerinas-do, but _still!_ ) 

Mina’s really good at what she can do between her legs, and that’s all Nayeon finds the time to worry about. Her pretty face and pretty smile and even prettier personality are just perks. _Really_ good perks. 

-

They’re comfortable. 

(Which is the _biggest_ understatement ever, perhaps.)

Nayeon doesn’t know if it’s because they’ve seen each other naked more times than both their fingers and toes can count, or maybe it’s just the odd results reaped from their even odder arrangements. (Sex and tacos right afterwards? _Only_ them.) Whatever it is, she supposes it’s just something that comes with the territory.

It’s been at least a few months now, give or take, and they've slowly become constants in each other's lives whether they like it or not. But it’s not like they’re complaining. 

Mina’s a nice person, cute personality and everything to boot, and the sex? The sex is _great_ . More than great. Nayeon has no problem keeping her around, doesn’t think she’ll be this lucky with anyone else either. No one gets her peanut butter and jelly sandwich cravings right after being fucked in the shower quite like Mina does. _No one._

Nayeon’s quite the character; she’s loud and gregarious, everything Mina isn’t. She blows up her own big head on the regular — calls herself adorable and a total catch all the time — and Mina can’t even deny it because fuck, she really is cute _and_ a catch. A real charmer, if she’s being honest. She’s good, _really_ good at what she does, and Mina doesn’t mind her company one bit either. They balance each other out pretty nicely, and she supposes that’s how they make it work so well.

Mina’s great, Nayeon’s great, they’re great. It’s great.

-

Mina has absolutely no problem tossing a key at her one day, telling her that she was eventually going to get one anyway, that it’s just more convenient that she has one so Mina doesn’t have to get up and open the door herself. Nayeon gives her one a week or so later, attached to a penguin keychain that she swears has nothing whatsoever to do with Mina. 

In retrospect, it probably wasn’t a good idea to give each other their house keys first thing, more so Mina than Nayeon. For all she knows, Nayeon could be some closet kleptomaniac or even a serial killer! Mina values her penguin plushies more than her own life at times _and_ she’s too pretty to die. Besides, what are the odds? Nayeon seems too good to be true sometimes, like her ideal type in a faraway pipe dream — good looking _and_ good in bed — so she can’t really say she’d be surprised, if at all, if it turns out she had a few screws loose. Whatever. 

Thankfully, she learns a lot later that Nayeon is not an impulsive stealer nor does she find enjoyment in slaying pretty girls during the dead of night. She is, however, a _cereal_ killer instead. She comes over whenever she’s all sorts of hungry, which happens to be _all_ the time, and proceeds to almost clear out everything in Mina’s pantry, starting with her Cheerios to even the sticks of butter in the fridge. The teeth marks left on them couldn’t be any more obvious.

(Or hungry in a different sense:

“Hey,” Nayeon’s taking a liking to practically barging into her room without notice these days. Mina’s not even surprised anymore. Her expression is bored as she plucks the lame romance book right out of Mina’s hands despite the sudden protests of finally getting to the good part. “I’m bored. Let me eat you out.")

But it’s not like Mina’s any better. 

Mina comes over whenever she wants. Literally. Sometimes, Nayeon’s in the middle of napping when Mina decides it’s the best time to come over, and not only does Nayeon wakes up from the sudden weight that settles on top of her, she wakes up to a _very_ horny weight on top of her. And sometimes, she comes over to sleep. Just sleep. Just because Nayeon’s apartment is closer to the dance building and after a super late night practice, she can’t be bothered to travel the longer distance back to her own place. Nayeon never really minds since living alone isn’t that fun and it’s always nice to cuddle someone to sleep. It just so happens that Mina is a great cuddler. It’s pretty awesome. 

Yeah, real awesome.

-

And it’s even gotten to the point where their friends are unfazed:

Sana, Mina’s best friend, always finds the time to swing by to make Mina try whatever she attempts to bake on that certain day. The first time is a little unconventional, Nayeon's only got her shorts halfway up when Sana walks right on in, no knock or ring at the doorbell or any prior indicator whatsoever. It’s a whole minute of silence, Sana staring right at Nayeon and Nayeon staring right back, unsure if she should continue pulling up her shorts or—

Sana’s scream decides for her. She lets go of her shorts immediately, trying to make a run for it when Sana barrels right toward her and tries to knock her out with her plate of brownies that look too good to be swung around like that. She trips over her shorts anyway, landing on the floor face first, and a total stranger gets a whole eyeful of her bunny face panties and is now yelling “pervert!” at her half-naked ass and Nayeon wants to do nothing but dig a hole and die in it. _Please God, take me now!_

Mina, thankfully, comes out of the bathroom in time to stop actual chaos from ensuing, even manages to pull Nayeon’s shorts back up whilst placating a hysterical Sana who is still very convinced that Nayeon is a pervert all at the same time. (“Only perverts take their pants off in a girl’s living room!”) 

And Nayeon? Nayeon’s on the verge of bursting into tears, having sealed her fate of suffering the eternal shame of burning the image of her ass in Sana’s mind forever. Plus, she’s thoroughly convinced that all of Mina’s friends are _literally_ nuts. Cuckoo on the entire scale of sanity.

In the end, Nayeon narrowly escapes death by a plate of brownies and they have a real fun time explaining why Nayeon was not taking her pants off in Mina’s living room, but rather putting them back on. Mina’s smile is smug and Nayeon’s is sheepish, both staring right at the couch Sana’s sitting on when she asks why, and not even a second later, Sana shoots right up from her seat, drops the plate of desserts on Mina’s coffee table, and leaves immediately. 

(She calls later, indignantly yelling at Mina through the phone to please, please, _please for the love of God_ — burn the couch.)

The second time, Nayeon’s appropriately dressed, _surprisingly_ , and sitting at Mina’s kitchen island with a pack of Oreos. Her grin is toothy at an attempt to be welcoming when she greets Sana, who thankfully, regards her back with more or less the slightest smile, settling down a plate of pretty nice looking canelés right in front of her. She even tells her to give some of them a try. Huh, color Nayeon impressed. Maybe Mina’s friends aren’t as batshit crazy as she thinks they are.

Nayeon offers her some Oreos in return, and there starts an argument on whether the creme or the cookie is the best part. Forget what she said earlier, Sana is _definitely_ crazy. Mina comes out right on time, once again, to prevent someone from getting knocked out with a plate, or even worse, the canelés themselves. 

The third time, Sana brings over a plate of cookies and leaves right after she hands them to Mina, says the three on top are for Nayeon. 

The icing job could use some work, she supposes, one of them with a clunky “sorry we got off on the wrong foot” squeezed onto possibly the smallest cookie on the entire platter. The other two say "u have a nice ass” and “your not that bad” with the wrong form of “you’re” used for spacing’s sake. Nonetheless, Nayeon’s content in a way she doesn’t really understand. It’s pretty nice that she’s gotten approval from Mina’s best friend, albeit unsure for what exactly, but she doesn’t really bother with it. She gets free food _and_ a pretty girl is baking them. It’s a win-win for her!

The fourth time, the fifth time, and even then on forth — Sana takes care in bringing enough for two, even when Nayeon’s not even there. 

Sana’s never asked, but Mina tells her offhandedly one day that Sana probably thinks they’re dating which is why she’s bringing extra pastries and the like. It works out for them — Sana’s a pretty good baker even though Mina told her more than once that the girl is a kitchen’s greatest walking hazard — because they’re both kind of benefitting from _whatever_ they are. Nayeon will never go hungry and Mina has someone to actually finish all the baked goods Sana brings over. It’s all good in the end. Everyone’s happy!

-

Momo and Jeongyeon are an entirely different story. 

It happens way before Nayeon’s even had a chance to tell them that she’s kind of preoccupied with someone in the lowest key of ways. Not really seeing someone, but still seeing someone. _Get it?_

They walk in when Nayeon’s in the middle of eating Mina out like her entire life depended on it, and they make their presence very known by slamming the door shut and Momo yells out a very teary sounding “sorry!” while Jeongyeon swears fifty times per minute and makes it a sudden life goal to see to the end of Nayeon’s.

 _Oops._ Okay, it’s kinda Nayeon’s fault — she forgot to lock her room, a little too intent on getting Mina’s pants off before they even hit the bed.

Mina just so happened to come over before her friends did, a hurried text that consisted of nothing but “5 mins” and a string of inappropriate emojis, and naturally so, she forgets that her friends were coming over as well. How could she even _dare_ remember when she’s got a beyond pretty girl settled in her lap? Forget them! 

Most people would be frantic or completely embarrassed or even immediately turned off at the prospect of getting caught in the middle of it, she supposes, but Mina? Mina isn’t most people. If anything, that kinky little shit gets off on it.

(She does, unsurprisingly. Nayeon saw it coming. Thankfully, it’s quicker than usual, and Nayeon would rather deal with a very angry pair of friends and a thoroughly satisfied Mina rather than three people angry at her — whoever would be angrier, she’s not even sure.)

Mina has some kind of rehearsal to get to, so she wastes no time in making herself presentable once again before rushing out of the door, right past Jeongyeon and Momo (and she doesn’t forget to greet them, says she’ll introduce herself next time when she’s not in a rush and hopefully, under better circumstances). Part of Nayeon feels like Mina was just saving face and of course, leaving the hard part up to her. She didn’t even get the chance to come! And now she can’t even deal with herself because her friends are probably formulating a thousand different ways to plot her death just because she just so happened to forget to lock her door! God, she’ll get back at her later.

Though thankfully, for the most part, they take it well. It’s nothing new, Nayeon’s proclivity for promiscuity, but the prospect of her only sleeping with _one_ girl for God knows how long now? Record-breaking! Jeongyeon apparently now owes Momo twenty bucks and a week of chicken nuggets, the two friends having bet ages ago on whether or not Nayeon would ever find a girl that she liked enough to sleep with more than twice. 

Though other than the very glaring fact that her friends only use her to get money out of each other, the other two are hardly bothered by the reality of another sudden addition to their lives. Whoever Nayeon’s fucking on the regular must _mean_ something anyway. They know her name and face and Nayeon’s even taken the time to introduce her to them, albeit crudely (because there are _so_ many other better things to say than “this is Mina, the girl I’m banging”), and Nayeon _never_ introduces girls to them because most of them are only one night stands, or just girls that Nayeon have no intention of keeping for long. Mina is a nice change of pace, a very well-needed breath of fresh air. Christ, it’s a _good_ thing.

It relieves Nayeon, though she’s not sure why she even cares whether Jeongyeon and Momo approve of Mina. It’s not like it matters whether or not they like the girl she’s merely sleeping with for the shits and giggles. However, it all works out in the end. Jeongyeon and Momo like Mina. Mina likes Jeongyeon and Momo. And Mina has absolutely no problem inserting herself in a mess that once went by Jeongyeon, Momo, and Nayeon (in order of brains) and Nayeon, Jeongyeon, and Momo (in order of age) interchangeably. It’s fine, right?

Momo, though still trying to get over how starstruck every time she sees Mina — it must be a dancer _and_ Japanese thing — warms up to the girl almost immediately. Several meetings later, both of them somehow turn Nayeon’s living room into some impromptu dance studio, with Mina teaching Momo the art of contemporary dance and Momo showing Mina the wonders of urban dancing. It’s great that they’re getting along, both being dance majors, but Nayeon’s living room isn’t fit to be a dance studio at all. More times than often, she’s woken up from her midday nap just because Momo accidentally knocks over her speaker system yet again or someone dances, quite literally, straight into a wall. Momo’s even sad these days when she comes over and Mina’s not there. 

(“Ew, it’s just you today?”

“This is _my_ apartment!”)

It doesn’t take long for Jeongyeon to follow right after. One afternoon sees Jeongyeon bringing her Switch over and then proceeding to get her ass handed to her on Super Smash by Mina who’s never even played the game before. Nayeon literally revels in Jeongyeon’s goofy face of defeat when her self-acclaimed one hundred hours on the said game gets put to shame and even tells Mina to do it again. By nighttime, Jeongyeon still cannot fathom how Mina manages to constantly beat her over and over again despite being a one-trick Olimar, but nonetheless, she gains herself a pretty formidable Super Smash opponent _and_ a new gaming buddy. Which is great because that means Nayeon and Momo, both filthy casuals and fall off the map more times than they can land a hit on each other, aren’t forced to play anything with Jeongyeon anymore. But it’s also not so great because Jeongyeon is now immune to catching them in the middle of sex — more than once now! — and merely tells them to finish up and get decent and meet her in the living room in ten because Mario Party isn’t going to play itself.

But in the end, everyone’s happy! Mina might just be the _best_ friend with benefits there is — not only does Nayeon benefit, but it seems that everyone else does as well! Momo gets someone who appreciates dance as much as she does and Jeongyeon can finally play games with someone that can _actually_ play. Mina earns two new idiot friends out of this whole ordeal, and Nayeon is perfectly content with where her life is for possibly the first time in her entire life.

Though just _one_ tiny thing gets in the way sometimes:

“I don’t know how you did it,” Momo says to her randomly when Nayeon’s sprawled across the couch and waiting for Momo and Mina to be done with whatever dancing thing they were doing so Nayeon can get Mina for the remainder of the day to do… definitely _not_ family-friendly things, really. Like usual. 

“Do what?”

“How did _you_ ,” Momo jabs a finger at her ass, which earns her a brief kick, “out of all people possible,” another jab, another kick, “manage to get Mina to be your girlfriend? She’s so… Mina and you’re so... _well_ , Nayeon.”

Both Mina and Nayeon immediately jerk their heads to stare at Momo. It’s silent for the longest second, with Nayeon’s gaze shooting back and forth between Mina and Momo, the both of them looking equally as confused as her, if not even more. Girlfriend? No way, Mina’s not her girlfriend. And what is Momo even talking about? What does she even mean she’s _so_ Nayeon? Nayeon doesn’t know if she should be offended or not.

(For the record, she could _totally_ get Myoui Mina to be her girlfriend… if she was interested in having her as a girlfriend in the first place!)

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Nayeon finally manages to say with a laugh, glancing over at Mina who only vigorously nods in agreement. Momo looks even more confused than she was before. “We’re not dating.”

“Yeah,” Mina adds nonchalantly not even a beat later, smile growing smug, “I don’t date losers anyway.”

“ _Hey!_ "

Then:

“Mina,” Sana’s voice blares through the speaker, and Nayeon’s definitely not happy about being interrupted nor is she feeling particularly nice, continuing to press open-mouthed kisses down the stretch of Mina’s neck despite the other girl’s silent glare of _don’t you dare_.

“Kinda busy, Sana,” Mina mumbles into the speaker, trying to push Nayeon off of her. “Any chance you can call back later?”

“It’s nothing, really…” Sana continues on anyway, ignoring Mina’s words. “Just that your ex is being nosy again because she saw you and Nayeon together the other day.”

“Hi, Sana,” Nayeon pipes up all of a sudden, lips ghosting Mina’s jaw and in tandem with a hand that slides underneath the hem of Mina’s shirt.

Mina knees her in the side almost immediately for that. _What do you think you’re doing?_ she mouths, and Nayeon’s smile is nothing but trouble.

“Nayeon! Hi! I didn’t know you were with Mina.”

“Wouldn’t be anywhere else,” Nayeon says with a smug grin that has Mina rolling her eyes, but the girl’s quick to change demeanor once she feels Nayeon’s hands hot against her breasts and her knee easing right up between her legs. “Just wanted to say hi, but go ahead and continue your conversation. I’m gonna go raid Mina’s fridge.”

Raiding Mina’s fridge as in: 

Mina bristles, mouth opening to yell at Nayeon for doing less-than-appropriate things while she’s on the phone with her best friend, but she’s quick to shut herself up when Nayeon presses with her knee, just barely.

“Mina?”

Mina _really_ can’t help that roll of her hips that has the biggest, shit-eating grin she’s ever seen grow on Nayeon’s face. “Y-Yeah?"

“Anyway, Tzuyu told me. She kept asking all these questions and being totally hung up about it, so are you _sure_ she’s completely over you because it really doesn’t seem like it?”

“It’s not really my problem if Chae isn’t over— _oh my god_ —”

Nayeon’s hands find their way to her hips quickly, guiding her right up against her knee, and Mina’s hand flies up over her mouth to press that moan right back down. 

“Mina? Are you okay?”

“Ye— yes, sorry… I just… uh, banged my knee against my… desk. Yeah. I’m good. Totally fine.” She manages to grit out, a hand moving to grasp Nayeon’s wrist. Honestly, she’s not even sure if she’s trying to stop her or tell her to continue at this point. 

Once Sana hangs up, she’s going to _kill_ Nayeon, though the needy rock of her hips and Nayeon’s satisfied ass smile indicates anything _but_.

“Okay,” Sana sounds a little skeptical, but she doesn’t question it. "Also, Tzuyu wants to hang out sometime this week if you’re free? She’s pretty bummed you didn’t tell her you had a new girlfriend.”

“Me? New girlfriend? Who?”

“Uh... Nayeon? You’re dating, right?”

“Nayeon?” Even Nayeon stops, hands stilling her hips and brows furrowed as she starts paying attention to the conversation. "She’s not my girlfriend. We’re not dating.”

“Huh? Then what a—“

Before she knows it, Nayeon grabs the phone out of her hand. One of her hands is quick to slip into Mina's panties, earning a terribly timed moan from Mina that has the girl slapping a hand over her mouth a second too late. Sana clearly can hear everything. “We’re fucking, Sana. Like right now. Mina will call you back later. Bye!”

Nayeon hangs up immediately afterwards, throws Mina’s phone elsewhere. She knows Mina’s already formulating fifty thousand ways to end her life by basically embarrassing her in front of her best friend, but hey — sex always trumps stupid talk about Mina’s annoying ex — and she knows Mina well enough that she generally tries to avoid talking about her ex-girlfriend and Nayeon was just making it easier for her.

“I’ll kill you _later_ ,” Mina speaks her thoughts for her, though her cheeks are ruddy and her hips, once again, are jumpy against her.

“Good,” Nayeon grins, toothy, holding Mina’s hips and place and moving downwards to press a hard kiss against her navel. Her fingers work faster than her mouth, already tugging Mina's panties down. She licks her lips. “I’ve got a fridge to raid."

And:

One day, Jeongyeon bursts through her door without a word, hands over her eyes, as if she was completely prepared to see Nayeon and Mina up to nothing but R rated things. Her expression shifts when she peeks through her fingers and realizes it’s only Nayeon watching Netflix on her phone. “Your girlfriend isn’t here? Wow, _shocking_.”

“She is _not_ my girlfriend!”

Nayeon has shouted to the Gods below and above, her neighbors perhaps, and a million times through video call. She’s even sure that her entire apartment complex knows at this point — for this time and all the next times that will come, Mina is _not_ her girlfriend!

-

Her and Mina? Together? Dating? _Girlfriends?_

_Pfffffft!_

-

They don’t talk about it.

Which makes sense because they aren’t dating even though everyone thinks they are. There’s no need to talk about something that isn’t a thing.

Mina’s fine. Nayeon’s fine. They’re _fine_. 

Everything’s fine.

-

It comes like clockwork these days, being apart of each other’s lives so easily and what not. Nayeon’s having a good time. Mina’s having a good time. Their friends are all having a good time. That’s all that this is about, right? Having a good time. It’s _all_ good.

They get awesome sex and lazy make out sessions and fun food dates without worrying about dumb things like feelings and the responsibility of a relationship. This is good, this is fine, this is frankly _everything_ Nayeon could ever ask for without actually asking for it. Likewise for Mina.

So it’s not a surprise, not at all, when they catch each other in an empty hallway of the performing arts building after Mina had texted, more or less passive-aggressively, and prompted her race halfway across campus to get here. Nayeon had made quick work to check Mina’s schedule (that she also so dutifully plugged into her own calendar), for more than important reasons, _of course_ , and before she even knows it, she’s pulled into the nearest unoccupied dance room.

This is definitely not dance rehearsal. This is definitely _not_ allowed either, and she wasn’t even planning on doing anything here but maybe make out for a little bit and then drag Mina back to her apartment. She just can’t help it, however, when Mina looks like _this_ , all sweaty and in the shortest _and_ tightest ass pair of shorts she has ever seen in her entire life. Mina seems to have plans of her own though, and she’s even the first one to do something, duffle bag dumped to the floor and fingers grasping at her collar as she pulls her in for a searing kiss. 

“I just got done with practice,” Mina breathes hot all over her mouth when they pull away for oxygen, “and my partner for the upcoming showcase is an insufferable piece of shit. Please tell me you’re here to be useful.”

“Sure, if that’s what you want,” Nayeon replies easily, just like what Mina wants to hear, before Mina chases after her lips once again. 

It’s not like Nayeon had come by to sit down for a chat. Mina’s text told her to do otherwise. It’s never really like that with them. Their arrangement is anything but uncommon, but Nayeon can’t help that feeling that blossoms deep in the pit of her stomach. It feels a little like butterflies — no, scratch that — it feels like jelly, the kind that wiggles and wobbles and tastes good, equivalent to the feel-good feeling that burrows itself deep underneath her skin. She doesn’t know what it is — at least _not yet!_ — but the thought of it goes away before she can even concern herself with it. She’s only here to get Mina off and vice versa. Maybe get food afterwards if she's hungry. Nothing more to it. 

Instead, she forces all her worries onto the fact that they’re about to fuck in a dance room that basically anyone has access to and can walk in on them at any given time. Nayeon doesn’t _do_ public (and Mina merely tells her not to knock until she tries, smile devious.) Mina even puts on music, volume all the way up, to make it seem like someone’s practicing so there’s even less of a chance of someone walking in though it does anything but reassure Nayeon. _Yeah, sure, put on your sex playlist and say you're practicing to that_ , Nayeon muses to herself belatedly, when she’s already got Mina’s sports bra off, palming her pretty little tits, and she decides on the spot that _fuck it_ , it’s a little too late to turn back now. 

In hindsight, all of the qualms she had about this whole ordeal turn out to be the very _least_ of her concerns. Those big ass mirrors that intimidated her at first turn out to be a blessing, as she finds out a little too quickly that she likes it, likes it _a lot_ when she can watch herself fuck Mina. And it’s even _better_ when she makes Mina watch herself, revels in the face Mina makes when her face glows red and she’s laid out so obscenely in front of the mirror, heat slick and practically dripping down her thighs as Nayeon works in a third finger and grinds against her ass. Mina _almost_ comes at the sight of herself.

“Fuck,” Nayeon bites at the curve of her neck, not a bit mindful of the intensity, “look at yourself, stretched around my fingers like that. Do you see how wet you are? Dripping all over my hand like that? Fuck, fuck, _fuck_ , you're so hot.”

It doesn’t take long for Mina to come undone, working herself so earnestly against her fingers, a messy, mismatched rhythm that only Nayeon knows how to follow. She falls apart so beautifully around her, and Nayeon can’t help but to fumble with her clit, just to work in that last bit of overstimulation and draw all those pretty noises out of Mina. It's cute, as cute as it can be at least, when Mina's hips jolt on their own and she’s mewling softly through her release. Nayeon wastes no time in easing her messy fingers into Mina’s mouth, and then she’s quick to clean the rest of her up, dropping low, and tongue lapping at all the pooling wetness. Doesn’t let any of it go to waste.

Mina even manages to return the favor, hands shaky as she plants herself on the floor. She eventually gets Nayeon’s pants off, drags Nayeon’s hips over her face, relishes in the sight of Nayeon practically leaking everywhere, and gets her off with such fervor that it has Nayeon threatening to yank two handfuls of her hair out. She rocks down a little too harshly, Mina having to slap at her thigh repeatedly just so she can get her centimeter of breathing room back.

It’s just so lewd that it forces her to teeter over the edge without much compared to usual, how she watches herself, pressed _so_ intimately against Mina’s mouth. How every time she jerks her hips, she can feel every single drag of Mina’s tongue against her. How she can basically _see_ herself desperately fuck Mina’s face, frantically chasing after her own release. 

And when Nayeon finally comes, it’s all wet and teary and whiny. Her knees tremble on either side of Mina’s head and her legs feel weak, but Mina’s hands are wrapped firmly around her thighs, insistent on keeping her close to get every last bit of her on her tongue. 

It’s when they’re all done, clothes back on and both equally fucked out, does the feeling in Nayeon’s stomach come back. They fuck and then they go about their separate ways, like usual, but somehow this time, it feels a little empty. They’re friends, she guesses, hence their “friends with benefits” title, and the last thing Nayeon wants to do is even attempt to test the borders of that. There are no feelings behind any of _this_ , not even a lick of it. They never said that they were strictly benefits and _not_ friends, so she figures there’s nothing wrong with this:

“Wanna get boba or something?” 

It feels kind of weird. She doesn’t know why — they practically live at each other’s apartments and do a lot of the shit that normal friends don’t — but it just does. She realizes she’s never actually _asked_ Mina to hang out, properly at least, because sex is anything but proper and can that really be called “hanging out?” Yeah, probably, but— _whatever,_ you get her!

Mina, who already said her thanks and has her bag hoisted back up on her shoulder, seems surprised for the longest second before she works up a smile that makes something in Nayeon’s chest shift for whatever reason. She doesn’t even question her. “Your treat?”

“Yeah, why not,” and Nayeon can’t help but think that yeah, this _is_ comfortable, this _is_ fine.

-

“So… tell me about yourself,” Nayeon says, suddenly, breaking the second-long silence as she wedges the straw between her lips to take a sip of her drink.

That’s the kind of stuff they say on first dates, right? Not like this is totally a date, but Nayeon figures it works all the same.

“Me?” Mina questions as if there was someone else sitting with them, or even in close proximity of them.

“No, not you,” Nayeon rolls her eyes. Might as well have fun with this. “I’m obviously talking to the dude behind you.”

Mina, completely clueless, turns her head just the slightest to catch a glimpse of the person behind her. There is, in fact, no one behind her, and the laugh Nayeon gives her when she turns back around is stupid and loud, makes her want to maybe throw her drink at her. “You’re an ass,” she pouts. 

“And you’re the one who actually turned around to look,” Nayeon can’t help reaching over to tug at Mina’s cheek, “but yes, you. Who else would I be talking to?”

Mina whispers a very dejected “the guy behind me” that has Nayeon laughing again. She wrangles Nayeon’s hand away, trying to twist her fingers in an attempt to shut her up. “Why are you asking?”

“I mean, I know we kind of… _you know_ … but I don’t know, I thought it’d be okay to know a few more things about each other.”

“Really? Nayeon, you have a key to my place. I think we know each other enough already.”

“No! I mean... like, other things. I don't know, like your favorite color or something.”

Mina stops toying with Nayeon’s fingers for a brief second. “You want to know my favorite color?”

Nayeon grins, finds this as the perfect opportunity to slot her fingers into the spaces between Mina’s own. Mina makes a face and tries to pull her hand away at how cringey all of this is but Nayeon keeps her locked in place. “I want to know everything about you.”

Mina regards her without a response to her words. There’s something indecipherable about her expression for the quickest second. Nayeon barely catches it, but even then, she decides not to question it. 

Her smile wavers, just a little bit. “Did I say something wrong?”

“No,” Mina finally replies, thankfully not prolonged enough to actually make it awkward. “I just... think I fell for you right then."

“Haha, real funny, Mina.” Nayeon says, a small laugh following her words although it seems a little forced and awkward.

Mina remains silent, face entirely unchanging.

Wait, what? Is Mina being serious?

Nayeon’s face cycles through a moment of confusion, doubt, and then finally disbelief. What? Mina? Falling? For _her?_ _No, no, no, no, no_ — this can’t be happening right now. Mina even looks serious. Oh God, she can feel her heart dropping to her stomach. “W-What?”

Almost immediately, Mina doesn’t even bother keeping her laugh in anymore. Nayeon, even as her mind continues to try its hardest to wrap itself around the words Mina had just said, can’t help but think that it’s pretty, really pretty and reminiscent of tinkering bell chimes. _What are you even thinking right now?!_

“I’m kidding,” Mina manages through a bunch of giggles. She gives Nayeon’s hand a squeeze, and oh— _oh, they’re still holding hands._ “Did you really believe me?”

“N… N-No!” Nayeon splutters out. _Yes. Oh my god._ “Of course not!”

“Then what was _that_?”

Nayeon clears her throat, trying to save as much face possible as she regains her posture. “I was just playing along. Duh.”

“Sure you were,” Mina says, doesn’t seem like she believes her anyway, but she doesn’t bother with it anymore. Her grip relaxes in Nayeon’s hold. “It’s red, by the way. My favorite color.”

Nayeon nods. She forgoes calling Mina a basic bitch because red is everyone’s favorite color, but she proceeds to commit her words to memory regardless. Who is she kidding, her own favorite color is blue!

“Oh!” Nayeon exclaims suddenly, the gears clicking in her head as she finally puts two and two together. She jostles their still interlocked hands out of pure excitement. “So that’s why your panties are always red!”

Mina’s brow twitches. Nayeon grins wider. 

“ _Ow_ , Mina! My hand!"

-

It’s all good.

Other than Mina attempting to once again break her fingers and almost being successful this time, it goes well. Mina’s even cuter than what Nayeon could imagine possible, not that she knew how exactly cute she was to begin with, but it fits anyway. Her favorite color is red, and it apparently has nothing to do with her choices in panties, but Nayeon begs to differ. She’s probably out to get Nayeon’s wallet as well because she orders herself a large, doesn’t even finish it, and promptly forces Nayeon to drink it for her, despite all her protests of hating fruit tea. 

Nayeon likes it, whatever _it_ is really, because Mina’s a pretty cute person and it’s fun to be with her. She likes how they can fool around and continue to be comfy with each other right afterwards no matter what really happens, likes how her hand feels in her own, likes how it’s just _easy_ with her. Really easy. She doesn’t even have to worry about anything whenever she’s with Mina, never at all, because Mina always laughs at her lame dad jokes even though they're not funny, always makes that feel-good kind of warmth spread deep within her chest whenever she smiles, laughs, or does _anything_ , really. (Did she also mention how she likes holding Mina’s hand? No? Well, she does!)

Good? Still good!

-

And as if the universe had heard her in that single moment:

Nayeon finds out some things slowly, and some all at once. Sometimes, she didn't even know that she _knew_ , but she always has. It feels like some kind of universal shift, like everything falling into place in all the weirdest ways that feel nothing _but_ right. That’s kind of the scary thing about this whole thing: how _right_ it feels.

So, it dwindles down to one conclusion, that this is the doing of God himself, reason behind it unbeknownst to Nayeon herself.

(Though, through fleeting carelessness, a shred of tenderness sprouts within her wild heart. Characteristically, however, she ignores it.)

It’s the big things that come first. You know, the things _everybody_ knows. 

Easily, she can rattle off all of Mina’s favorite things — her favorite animal is a penguin, food is ketchup (which Nayeon will argue until the eradication of humankind that ketchup is _not_ a food), ice cream is strawberry, game is something along the lines of Call of Doody— or, well, Duty (Mina gets mad!). The list goes on, can go on until forever, but she’ll save everyone else the trouble. 

She’s a _very_ pretty girl, with a very pretty _everything_ and an even prettier smile. Mina smiles with her whole face, kind of, eyes never failing to curve up into crescents and smile all teeth and a whole bunch of gum. She sports a single silver tooth, way back alongside her molars, only visible if she laughs hard enough. Easy to miss, though a definite sight for sore eyes. 

She’s from Japan, the youngest of a happy family of four. Nayeon’s only seen pictures in passing, plastered in all sorts of corners at Mina’s place, but she seems very family-oriented and it’s all very endearing. Her brother's way older than her, and in the midst of pursuing some sort of athletic career in America. Her dad’s some kind of doctor that specializes in something Nayeon definitely can’t pronounce, and her mom is very pretty. Mina looks a lot like her. She’s even met Mina’s parents twice already, both times being due to terrible timing and only consisting of very brief greetings through video call, but they’re very nice people despite Nayeon’s less-than-stellar Japanese, her knowledge extending to only a couple of words here and there picked up from twenty-four whole episodes of Lucky Star. Most of the time, Nayeon is content with just listening to Mina converse with her parents although she doesn’t understand a single word they’re saying. She always looks so happy and excited whenever she does, so it’s hard not to like it. Happy and excited Mina is very likable and _very_ cute. 

She has a dog, a tiny little dachshund named Ray, whom Nayeon’s only been acquainted with through a whole four hundred picture photo album and yet again, a very, _very_ poorly timed video call right after their _usual_ business. A total dog person, if it wasn’t already obvious, and she’s even already dedicated her life to Nayeon’s own dog, just because she was lucky enough to come over when Nayeon was stuck with dog duty for the weekend. Needless to say, Nayeon’s dog probably likes Mina more than her now. _Boooo._

A music junkie that swears by the likes of Taylor Swift (before she died, _of course_ ) and One Direction; though her tastes are parallel to that of a sixteen-year-old girl in the deep throes of her teenage era, she still claims to be a lover of all kinds of music. But who is Nayeon to deny the existence of The Story Of Us and 18? _Don’t tell Mina!_ A dog-eared, A1 sized poster of the archetypal boy band still hangs proudly on one of her walls, though a bit lopsided — a tasteless choice in decor, perhaps. It serves its purpose in being one of Nayeon’s most favorite things to complain about ever; it’s very unnerving and all sorts of awkward, especially when she’s, _ahem,_ busy going down to town on Mina, and always somehow manages to get a whole eyeful of five grinning, unknowing faces from simpler times in the midst of it all. Oh, the absolute _horror_.

Then, the tiny things:

Mina takes her coffee with two sugars and four creams, nothing more and nothing less. Nayeon learns through trial and error and a flurry of entirely wrong orders, learns that Mina’s not the biggest fan of iced coffee though sometimes she has cravings for an iced caramel macchiato. Likes her coffee with a croissant on the side, maybe a breakfast bagel if she’s feeling indulgent. 

She always ties her shoes right, then left. Dots her i’s with hearts. Likes to bump shoulders when walking like some deviation of footsies. Prefers vanilla over chocolate. Pineapple on her pizza. 

An egregious drunk that always thinks Nayeon is her ex (and she’s _seen_ her ex; Nayeon is offended that Mina, sober or not, thinks she’s even _that_ short) and won’t take no for an answer. Forces her to come pick her up from whatever shady ass nightclub her dance hall friends make her go to and then seemingly loses her ability to walk all in one go, which _always_ results in Nayeon piggybacking her all the way back home. Proceeds to projectile puke all over her favorite potted plant and refuses to let Nayeon go back home until she gets to kiss her knight in dirty Vans goodbye, vomit-breath and everything. 

Mina plays the ukulele, nothing short of impressive. Though whenever prompted to play, after a teeny tiny bit of badgering, the only bars she strums are from Mraz's _I'm Yours_. Sometimes _Can’t Help Falling In Love_ if she feels like it. Both of them love songs, she notes, and doesn’t miss the way Mina hums the lyrics like they’re for someone.

A splattering of moles take their place all across Mina’s face — like a constellation of sorts — and Nayeon’s found recent enjoyment in tracing them, albeit clumsily, when she just so happens to wake before Mina does. Which, when paired with Nayeon’s propensity to attempt to count them every single time but only ends up jostling Mina awake, makes for a pretty funky sleep schedule. To this day, she doesn’t know how many there are, but she supposes it doesn’t matter, not when Mina merely swats her hands away, kisses her soundly, and tells her not to worry about it, very much so sleepy-voiced and all. 

She finds out this one a lot later, when Mina saunters in through the door, wearing the same exact hoodie Nayeon was looking for all week. In the end, she doesn’t say anything, doesn’t really want to either since she’s granted the sight of Mina in _her_ oversized hoodie that’s at least a size too big for her, and just lets Mina cuddle up against her almost the entire night and then leave with it once again. Oh well, it looks cuter on Mina anyway. Soon after, more and more of her clothes start going missing, only to show up several days later on Mina. She doesn’t really mind it, not really, not when Mina somehow manages to look absolutely cuter in everything that Nayeon thought looked the cutest on herself. A habit for stealing _only_ her clothes, Nayeon deems it, but Mina refutes it every single time she brings it up offhandedly, saying something along the lines of all her shirts being comfortable enough to _need_ to join her collection of weekend wear ASAP.

It’s the big things and the tiny things, the things that everyone knows and the things that nobody else but her knows. The things that come in seconds and the things that come with time. It’s the things that are all Mina, the things that don’t fail to go unnoticed by Nayeon, who nowadays obligates almost everything about Mina to memory. No reason why, just does.

The feeling in her stomach returns. Nayeon ignores it.

-

“Are you… _you know_ … with other people?”

Nayeon doesn’t even know why she asks. They don’t talk about this kind of stuff, and Nayeon doesn’t have any right to be asking, really. It’s not like it’s any of her business either, but she just— she doesn’t know— she just lets her mouth run before she thinks and now she’s here, currently half-naked atop her bed, with Mina in the middle of stripping off her own shorts— _oh,_ and her bra too.

It’s been at the back of her mind for a while now, she supposes, which is probably why she went ahead and dropped the dumbest question out of all the dumb questions she has in the back of her head. Mina? Super-hot-and-super-cute-and-super-great-in-bed-Mina? Sleeping with other people? Very likely. She doesn’t even know why she wants to know — just knows well enough that the answer, a very probable, smack-in-the-face _yes_ — nor why it should matter to her if Mina is. Mina’s her own person and she can do her own thing. It’s not like they’re bound to each other just because yeah, they bang a lot and make out with each other regularly and sleep at each other’s places almost all the time and everyone always thinks they’re dating or something ridiculous like that. It’s not like she _cares_ if she is or not.

(… _Right?_ ) 

Mina looks amused, like she has some snark on the tip of her tongue ready for her, but she seems to decide against it. Nayeon shifts uncomfortably under her gaze, not even sure why she does. “No, Nayeon. I’m not. You’re the only one.”

 _Oh my god._ Nayeon literally _feels_ the wave of relief wash through her for no reason whatsoever, and she even lets go of the breath she didn’t know she was holding. Her gaze, however, focuses in on Mina’s tits, just because they’re nice as hell, but also to keep herself grounded and away from accidentally slipping up. Mina tuts, only tells her that her eyes are up above. 

“Oh,” Nayeon says lamely, a little hurriedly, and she can’t help but feel like this just took a turn for the worse and got entirely a lot more awkward than she thought it would’ve. Though it is anything _but_ . Okay, so she’s _not_ sleeping with anyone else — which is great, _super great_ — but now what? “ _Oh,_ well, that’s— that’s… good. I— I don’t wanna, like, catch something, you know? Like that kind of stuff happens when you’re… uh, _y’know_ , with other people… too.” 

Mina, however, cracks a smile and there’s something that glimmers in her eyes, like she knows something Nayeon doesn’t. “Are _you?_ ”

“N-No,” Nayeon barely manages, suddenly shy for whatever reason. Mina takes it in with stride, laugh pretty as she crawls closer, arms finding their way around her neck as she moves to settle in her lap comfortably. “Just you.”

Something deep inside her chest shifts. Does this… mean _something?_ Or anything? It shouldn’t, right? Mina happens to not be sleeping with anyone else at the moment, and Nayeon _just_ so happens to be doing the same. It’s not her fault she’s a picky person, nor does she find pride in upping her body count weekly. It’s _just_ a total coincidence. Nothing unusual about that.

“Just me?” Mina doesn’t give her the chance to reply, already leaning in to close the distance between them. It’s brief, a couple kisses exchanged here and there, and thankfully, it does its job in quelling the tremble underneath Nayeon’s ribs. If anything, Mina looks somewhat relieved as well, though she’s so, so much better at managing it than Nayeon will ever be. “ _Good_."

-

“So… let me get this straight. Okay, maybe _not_ straight since you’re obviously no— okay, never mind. You’re telling me you’re... _not_ dating Mina?”

“I told you already! We aren’t!” Nayeon leans back against her pillows, almost completely sinking into them.

Jeongyeon sends her a look, completely unconvinced. “Are you _sure?_ I mean, it’s okay if you guys are, like it’s great that you’re finally settling down since Jen—“

“—but we _aren’t_ ,” Nayeon affirms, cutting Jeongyeon off before she can start opening up the things that Nayeon desperately wants to keep closed. “Why do you keep thinking that? I told you before we were just having fun. Nothing else.”

“It just,” Jeongyeon says, toying with the bouncy ball she plucks off of Nayeon’s desk. “I don’t know, it just always seems like you guys are? For starters, either she’s always here or you’re always at her place. She has a key, Nayeon. I’ve known you since you were eight years old and still wetting your bed and I don't even have keys! She even has her own mug here!” 

“ _And?_ "

“ _And_ what I’m saying is,” Jeongyeon sighs, “you guys do all the things people do when they’re _dating_. It’s kind of hard not to assume?”

“I told you, Jeongyeon,” and Nayeon seems like she doesn’t want to talk about this anymore, attempting to chuck one of her many pillows at Jeongyeon, “we’re just fucking! Not dating! None of that stupid shit! How _hard_ is that to understand?”

Jeongyeon dodges the pillow easily and ignores her completely. “Do you like Mina?”

She sends a pillow flying smack dab in the middle of Jeongyeon’s face. 

-

Jeongyeon, a certified asshole of a best friend, doesn’t leave until she forces Nayeon to order fried chicken and beer. She doesn’t question her about Mina anymore for the remainder of the night, but Nayeon _knows_ she still wants to drill some useless shit into her head about her dubious “relations” with Mina. Jeongyeon’s always been a lot more level-headed than her, the “I told you so” to her “nothing will go wrong,” and definitely way more responsible than she’ll ever be in her entire life, so perhaps her concerns aren’t as farfetched as Nayeon thinks they are but still — Nayeon is a grown ass adult. She knows what she’s doing (most of the time) even though it always seems like she doesn’t so she definitely doesn’t need Jeongyeon questioning her about the logistics of her relationship with Mina. She’s got this all under control, no worries.

“Think about it,” is all Jeongyeon says before she leaves, hugging a box of leftover chicken and already red-faced from a couple cans of beer.

What the hell. What is that even supposed to mean?! Think about _what?_ Jeongyeon’s super vague words make no sense at all, and she decides not to worry about it because Jeongyeon was halfway to being drunk anyway so she probably didn’t know what she was saying either. 

Her thoughts, although very much scattered and hazy, go as fast as they come, and Nayeon forgoes chasing them back when her phone lights up — a snap from Mina — and she suddenly feels warm all over. 

It’s definitely from the alcohol and _not_ the photo Mina sends, a blurry selfie with a terribly drawn stick figure beside her in bed that’s supposed to be her, apparently, if the added bunny teeth and the “u” scrawled above was anything to go by. The caption is a simple “cold >:(“ and it’s very ironic because Nayeon feels anything but. 

So instead of thinking about whatever the hell Jeongyeon said, Nayeon decides to think about Mina. Thinking about Mina is nice. It’s _always_ nice, and it’s great because Mina makes Nayeon feels good and warm all the damn time and it’s a feeling she just can’t miss nowadays.

Yup, totally under control. 

-

It’s only when she’s tucked herself into bed, six snaps later and heart beating like a staccato under her ribs alongside the remnants of alcohol in her veins, does she finally realize what Jeongyeon had meant:

_Do you like Mina?_

Oh.

_Oh._

Totally _not_ under control.

-

Although it probably wasn’t her intention, Jeongyeon is successful in being a total douchebag _and_ keeping her awake almost all night.

Though she isn’t sure which is more concerning:

Her best friend probably has some sort of agenda against her, her body might malfunction any minute now from the very unhealthy lack of sleep, or that she, no matter how much she puts her mind to it, has absolutely _no_ answer for the very question that has plagued her mind ever since it was first uttered.

_Do you like Mina?_

-

_Do you like Mina? Do you like Mina? Do you like Mina? Do you like Mina?_

_No!_ Wait, yes? No… yes… uh, yes! No! …Maybe? Yes, no, _maybe?_

-

Oh god. This is definitely _not_ something Nayeon wants to deal with. Not now, not _ever_. She’ll deny from hell and back that she does not like Mina, though there is possibly no otherworldly explanation for the tremor in her heart and the onslaught of jelly in her stomach whenever she merely thinks of the girl! Plus, the prospect of developing actual feelings for someone who only agreed to be in her life for the sole reason of fun and sex? Nayeon prefers her life to _not_ be a cliché, two-star romcom, thank you very much. 

So what that they kiss and fuck and do all the things that only girlfriends do? So _what?_ It doesn’t mean they’re dating. It just means that Nayeon likes to kiss and fuck and do girlfriend-y things with another girl that also happens to enjoy doing the same thing. That’s nothing. It’s anything _bu_ t a relationship.

And that’s the whole thing about this:

It’s not a relationship, it’s convenience.

Mina just happens to _conveniently_ be there, whether it’s just to fuck or eat pizza with or bother for attention while she’s in the middle of doing her homework. Nayeon also happens to _conveniently_ be there for Mina for the exact same reasons as well. That’s just kind of how it’s been ever since they’ve set foot into each other’s lives, and who is Nayeon to question the laws that the universe already set out for them?

They’re comfortable where they are right now. There is definitely no need to go around fucking things up just because oh, well, _maybe_ Nayeon might actually _like like_ Mina and could possibly singlehandedly ruin the only good thing going on in her life right now with one wrong move. Like hell she will! 

So:

Nah, Nayeon _doesn’t_ like Mina. Nope, not at all. 

-

Anyways,

It’s not like the mere sight of Mina makes all her blood rush to her head and the butterflies settle somewhere deep in the back of her chest. It’s not like Mina's smile makes Nayeon’s heart all jumpy and her stomach wants to implode with how much she feels in that singular second. 

It’s not like she sometimes thinks that Mina would make a pretty good girlfriend to whatever lucky bastard gets her in the future. It’s not like she thinks that it’d suck when that does inevitably happen, that sometimes she can’t even imagine Mina being with someone else (that isn’t her). It’s not like she’s jealous when she happens to see Mina with other people — the kinds that stick too close to be considered _just_ friends — on campus and all of a sudden her stomach flips in on itself and she feels sick. It’s not like Mina’s the first thing on her mind when it comes to _anything_ , whether she’s the first person Nayeon tells that she totally bombed that statistics exam or that she’s the first and last person to text every day. The one that gets all the good mornings and good nights. It’s not like she thinks no one can compare to Mina, not even her ex-girlfriend of a whopping two years, whom Nayeon even barely thinks about these days. 

It’s not like there’s always an unsettling feeling that digs itself deep into her stomach, that makes her want to keep Mina here, right by her side, and nowhere else. It’s not like she wakes up and feels that same kind of warmth she’s been feeling all the time these days when she sees Mina right next to her, still deep in slumber despite the sunlight that bleeds through the cracks in the blinds and spills across her skin, and thinks that yeah, this is _it_ , this is right where she _belongs_ , this is exactly where she _needs_ to be.

It’s not like she likes Mina. 

-

_Fuck._

-

Nayeon can deny all she wants, as many goddamn times as she wants, but everything ends up going to shit anyway because it all turns out to be the biggest lie she’s ever told in her entire life because now she can’t imagine an answer that isn’t anything _but_ this:

_Do you like Mina?_

Yes.

-

Okay, okay, okay. _Okay._ Back this up. 

_Oooookay,_ so maybe she _does_ like Mina.

You know what, screw the maybe.

She likes Mina. _A lot._ A fuck ton. A lot times a thousand!

Great! Nayeon’s finally acting like her actual age and coming to terms with possibly the nastiest thing on earth — _feelings_ — and holy shit, she likes Myoui Mina. _Likes likes_ her!

Nice. This will totally _not_ work out. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this entire first half was done literally MONTHS ago... like march/april so frankly i'm TIRED of looking at this  
> not sure when the next part will be complete but hopefully sometime... SOON... idk i can't guarantee anything bc of the holidays and the fact that i get writer's block every single time i open my word doc and try to write LOL
> 
> also!!! i'm generally very shy on social media but i thought it'd be a good idea to make some once friends LOL so i made a twitter!!! i'd love to chat so please come say hi!!! [click here!!](https://twitter.com/pikatzus) or find me @pikatzus :)  
> tbh i don't really know how to use it... someone please help ; __ ; 
> 
> i don't write a lot but hopefully next year that will change... i have 20+ minayeon drafts collecting dust on my laptop that i need to handle lol
> 
> kudos & comments are always appreciated!!!! since there's a whole second part of this fic yet to be completed, a lot of things are subject to change!! let me know what you like, what you don't, or just anything!!!! everything helps :)
> 
> thank you for reading!!


	2. oh no, i think i'm catching feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nayeon catches a bad case of feelings. Nayeon and Mina continue beating the drum. Oh, and other (possibly life-changing) things happen too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title taken from eden's sex ... my fellow tiktokers yall already know!!!!!  
> also u will also not understand the description if u don't read my jeongsa fic so plz read it. it's cute i promise :)
> 
> this was literally a BITCH to write... i hate it so much lmfaooo but it had to come out anyway  
>   
> also a quick note:  
> this was half of what was originally supposed to be part 2, but word didn't answer my plea to add a WORD LIMIT to a doc so i started writing WAY too much and now i have to keep splitting everything hhhhhha... so here we are!  
> don't be surprised if this ends up being like... 50 parts lol
> 
> hope you enjoy reading!  
> 

Okay _._

Wait.

Let’s think this through first.

A part of Nayeon feels like she’s mistaken, like she’s only getting all these crazy thoughts and thinking that she likes Mina just because Mina is technically the only girl in her life right now that’s something a lot more than friends, but definitely a little less than lovers. It makes sense, honestly, because Nayeon’s prone to having false crushes. She might’ve crushed on Momo for maybe two weeks in freshman year of college, just because she happened to see Momo’s abs in passing _and_ was given the honor to take a body shot off of them at some fraternity party not even hours later. Hell, she even thought she liked Jeongyeon in junior high once just because the girl had cut her hair to a length that was totally seventh-grade Nayeon’s type _and_ let her keep her pink pen.

Mina just happens to be just like the Jeongyeon in junior high, but with her cute ass smile, attractive personality, and insanely pretty _everything_ instead of a goddamn pink pen. It’s pretty easy to get it mixed up.

Pfft.

Fuck feelings! They do nothing but be gross and confuse everyone. She’d have absolutely no reservations about catapulting them off of the nearest cliff. Nayeon does _not_ need this right now.

Well, _unless…?_

-

“Dahyun?”

“ _Your house better be on fire or something right now for you to be calling me at three in the morning, Nayeon. What—_ “

“Can you come over?”

“ _Excuse me?_ ”

A beat of silence. Dahyun yawns into the speaker. “Well? Can you?”

There’s a sigh, and then a sleepy chuckle. “ _… Give me ten minutes._ "

Kim Dahyun is Momo’s friend whom Nayeon first met at an organizational event for some campus church society. Nayeon had no idea what she was doing there other than the fact she was given a free pocket bible (that she has no idea what she’s even done with), and she had soon come to realize that she had no idea what Dahyun was doing there either. Not even three days later, at whatever house party that a child of the high heavens definitely _shouldn’t_ have been at, they both had a little too much to drink and ended up knocking over someone’s mom’s fancy vase _and_ making out. More than once. And then a lot of times after that, completely sober and not. Definitely not a good church girl move, but hey, Nayeon digs it.

Dahyun is pretty cute, definitely the type that Nayeon likes pressing up against bathroom doors and the dark corners of the library, and Nayeon thinks she wouldn’t mind being in love with her. Life, of course, says fuck you and never works out like that. Dahyun is way too in love with Momo and Momo is way too _not_ in love with her and Nayeon only works herself into this equation by being the crush’s best friend that Dahyun kind of fucked once… twice… or maybe three times? Though that part was kind of uncalled for, honestly, because Dahyun was just trying to see if Momo happened to be seeing anyone at the moment by buddying it up with Nayeon, and Nayeon just happened to be feeling some type of way after seeing her ex’s snap story with a new girl. Needless to say, it all checked out in the end: Dahyun gets the single thing closest to Momo, and Nayeon got to, quite literally, fuck away her feelings.

(Of course, this was all _before_ Mina.)

Other than that, Nayeon guesses they’re friends or something like that. Something definitely more than acquaintances at least. They don’t really hang unless it’s with Momo and even with the sparing amount of times that they have, it’s always been more making out than actual hanging out. Sometimes, however, Dahyun does call her whenever she’s really _really_ bored and more times than often sends her game requests through text message. A cup pong pro she deems herself, even though Nayeon’s got a four-win streak on her. 

True to her words, there are a few knocks at her door roughly ten minutes later. Dahyun barrels in almost immediately after she opens the door, clad in nothing but her pajamas and a pair of crocs. Her hair is messy and she looks like she’d rather be anywhere but here, but still, she’s quick to regard Nayeon with a scowl before kicking her shoes off and then making a beeline for the couch.

“Hello to you too,” Nayeon says, far too amused as she closes the door. 

“I hate you,” is all Dahyun yells back from her sprawled position.

Nayeon only rolls her eyes before settling next to Dahyun on the couch. The girl is quick to get up despite looking perfectly comfortable laid out across the couch, easily planting herself right onto Nayeon’s lap. There’s nothing ideal about this: it’s three in the morning, Nayeon’s going through a whole ass crisis pertaining to Myoui Mina and doesn’t exactly know how to handle it, and Dahyun’s still hopelessly in love with a girl (who is totally denying her feelings for Dahyun, but Nayeon will let her figure that one out on her own) and using terrible coping mechanisms that include fucking the best friend of the girl she actually wants to fuck. 

“Yeah?” Nayeon’s grin is wide and stupid.

Dahyun only makes a sound of annoyance and kisses it right off.

It’s all tongue and teeth and everything Nayeon wished it wasn’t. She wishes she didn’t feel that offbeat somewhere deep down in her chest that tells her everything about this is wrong: that this isn’t the girl she wants to be kissing right now, that it just doesn’t feel _right_ to even be kissing Dahyun in the first place. She wishes she felt something, _anything_ , be it fireworks or jelly or electricity in her veins or the briefest spark ever, but there’s just _nothing_.

“Alright,” Dahyun murmurs against her mouth, giving her lower lip one last suck before pulling away, “what are you thinking about?”

“What?” Nayeon blinks, nearly chasing after Dahyun’s lips, but the girl’s quick to press her shoulders back against the couch.

“Well, for starters,” Dahyun laughs a little. “I think we’ve kissed enough for me to know you don’t kiss like that.”

“What do you mean? Like what?”

“It was kinda a mix of ‘I don’t know how to kiss’ and ‘I don’t know if I should kiss you or not,’” Dahyun says. “I’m betting on the latter.”

Nayeon’s a little bit offended at Dahyun’s words and she's about to defend her more-than-spectacular kissing skills (which are very much so approved by Mina), but then again that’s not really the point. Rather, she's silent as she lets out a sigh of defeat, leaning back against the couch pathetically. Dahyun only laughs again and gives her cheek a light pat.

“Is it that one girl? Minyoung?”

“It’s Mina,” Nayeon corrects her, and her brows furrow not even a second later. “Wait, how do you know about her?”

Dahyun gives her a look and then all gears in Nayeon’s head click. She shakes her head and sighs again. “Momo,” she breathes out. She should’ve known better. For one, Momo should be worrying about her own love life and definitely not Nayeon’s. Secondly, who the hell is Momo telling about Mina? There shouldn’t even be anything spreading because they are precisely _not_ the one thing everyone thinks they are.

Dahyun rolls off of her without another word, settling back into her position across the couch, but this time with her legs all over Nayeon. “Mina, huh? What’s the deal with her? Love at first sight? We-made-out-once-and-now-I-think-we-should-get-married? Or let me guess, she’s got a boyfriend and you totally did that thing where you’re gay as hell but you still fell for a straight girl because _whew!_ We’ve all been there, done that. You know, I’m starting to think that you’re not _really_ gay unless you fall for a straight girl, you feel?"

“… What are you even talking about?”

“Did I hit one? Or all of them?” Dahyun says, annoyingly wide grin spread across her face.

“None of them,” Nayeon scowls, giving Dahyun’s thigh a brief swat before she sighs and sinks herself deeper into the couch. 

“Give me a little bit more to work with, Im.”

“I know, it’s just—“ Nayeon racks her brain, trying to find the right words to describes _whatever_ it is that Myoui Mina and her are. “Mina and I… I don’t know, we just mess around and have fun. Friends with benefits if you want to call it something but then—“

Dahyun cuts her off. “But then one day you woke up and realized everything was just _different_ with her and now you’re like 'holy shit, I think I’m in love with her?’”

Nayeon sends Dahyun a glare, which has the girl bursting out into laughter. “Did I hit the bullseye?”

“What the hell,” Nayeon says under her breath. Dahyun’s looking at her so earnestly and Nayeon just hates how _right_ she is. She shakes her head and grumbles nonetheless. “Spot on. How did you even guess that?"

“That, my friend,” Dahyun says, proud puff in her chest, “is because it’s basically the plot for every stinkin’ shoujo manga there is out there. It just so happens that I’m kind of an expert. No need to thank me, of course.”

Nayeon rolls her eyes. Is being a manga expert even something to be proud of?

“But…” Dahyun yawns. “Even if your life is the biggest cliché in the world, it’d make a really good bedtime story. I’m going to sleep.” Dahyun gets up without another word, heading straight toward her room. Nayeon only sighs, following after her not even a second later.

Dahyun’s already made herself comfortable, bundled up underneath her covers and Nayeon flicks the lights off and slips in next to her. Immediately, Dahyun’s foot kicks her in the ass, and there’s a quiet “sorry” and then Dahyun’s leg is slung over her waist. 

“Really?”

“Listen, you made me come over at three in the morning. The least you can do is be my body pillow for a night.” 

Nayeon rolls flat onto her back and lets out a sigh. Dahyun has no problem scooting closer and snuggling up against her side. 

“So, this Mina girl…” Dahyun already sounds like she’s two seconds from falling asleep. “Tell me about her."

“She’s… how do I describe it, she’s… she’s just…” Nayeon lets out a small laugh. “She’s just Mina. The cheekiest bitch I’ve ever met in my life. She’s really cute too, and she’s kind of got this smile that makes your insides feel all funny and your heart kind of melts. A little, or a lot. It kinda depends.” That was all probably unnecessary information Dahyun didn’t need to know, but hey! It’s important. "There’s just something about her… I don’t know what it is, but it’s just… comfortable, you know? Like I can do and say all this dumb shit and she’d be cool with it. It’s weird.”

Dahyun hums, nodding slowly. Nayeon’s not sure if she gets it or not, but she rolls with it anyway. “What do you like about her?”

Nayeon blinks, eyes trained on the ceiling above them. What does she like about Mina? 

It’s a loaded question, honestly, because the first thing Nayeon thinks about is _everything_. She’s not even sure what to say or where to even start. She thinks of her smile, the gummy one and wide enough to see her single silver tooth. She thinks of the big things, the little things, and the tiny things. She thinks of just _her_ , how she’s memorized the moles that dot Mina’s face, how her fingertips tingle with muscle memory, mornings upon mornings spent tracing something that rivals even the likes of Orion. How her stomach feels like caving in and how easily she’s reduced to jelly. How she wants to say everything that is Mina, how she feels the words get caught in her throat when she tries. 

“Everything,” Nayeon breathes out, finally, almost inaudible, but Dahyun hears it regardless.

Dahyun can only snort. “Are you sure you’re not in love with her or something?”

“That’s kind of the thing,” Nayeon whispers, as if she’s scared that if she’s any louder, then the words will be out there, will start sinking deep into her skin and become _real_. “I think I am."

“Wow,” Dahyun laughs, soft and tapered. “You sound whipped as hell.”

Nayeon forgoes replying, deciding to remain silent and merely listen to the rise and fall of Dahyun’s breathing, each breath getting slower and slower until Nayeon’s certain she’s asleep. Her gaze remains stuck on the ceiling and it’s not long before her thoughts start running amok, louder than her heartbeat in her ears.

She thinks of Dahyun’s words, of her own. She thinks of how many things she had on the tip of the tongue, every single thing she had wanted to say at that very moment. How she could go on for hours, perhaps, but settled for something that was _everything_ , but also not nearly so. She’s starting to think she can’t talk about Mina, not when she thinks she could ramble about her for hours and hours and bore the next person to hell and back, when she knows Mina is just everything, and how she’s starting to feel like _her_ everything. Is this what it’s like to be in love?

Tell me about her. _Where do I even start? Her smile? Her personality? Her quirks? Her favorite food? How she likes her eggs? The things she likes doing on the weekends?_

What do you like about her? _Everything. I like everything. Every single thing there is._

Are you in love with her? _Yeah, I think I am._

-

When morning — or so she thinks — comes, Nayeon’s woken up almost immediately by the blare of her phone. It’s a whole ten seconds of her waiting for whoever calling to hang up, but then another second passes and she contemplates chucking her phone at the wall instead. She barely makes out Dahyun, still being dead to the world beside her, drooling all over her pillow and everything. With a groan, she’s rubbing the sleep out of her eyes when she huffs and puffs and gives up, picking up the phone without even looking at who it is.

“Hello?” she murmurs into the speaker. Hopefully, it’s Jeongyeon so she can hang up immediately without feeling bad. Or even Momo, who she will definitely feel a little bad about hanging up on, but _still_ , the both of them know that Nayeon’s anything but the epitome of nice when she’s woken up by anything that isn’t her faulty body clock.

“ _Hi,_ ” the voice on the other end speaks. It’s definitely not Jeongyeon, and Nayeon’s brain feels like it’s reduced to mush already from the simplest “hi” ever, lips unknowingly curling into a dopey smile. It’s Mina! Soft and cute-voiced Mina. Possibly the only person ever who will never be on the receiving end of Nayeon’s morning wrath. “ _Did you just wake up?_ ”

Although barely conscious and definitely still on the verge of falling back asleep, Nayeon feels the warmth start to grow in her chest. “Yeah,” and she even works up a sleepy laugh. “Morning!”

“ _It’s noon,_ ” Mina’s laugh in return doesn’t fail to make her heart bubble up in her chest, “ _but good morning, sleepyhead. Sleep well?_ ”

“Yeah, well, until _someone_ woke me up,” Nayeon yawns, loud. “What’s up? Did you need something?”

“ _Nah, just giving you a heads up that I’ll be over in twenty. Sana brought over homemade strawberry milk and some sandwiches earlier and she wanted you to try them._ ”

“Door’s always open for you, Mina. Literally. You have a key.”

“ _I was just letting you know in case I walk in on you getting yourself off or something like that._ ” There’s a brief pause. “ _Not that I would mind, but still._ "

“Don’t need to,” Nayeon muses. Dahyun shifts a little next to her, but still otherwise remains asleep. “I can wait twenty for you.”

“ _Aw,_ ” Mina’s laugh is soft. “ _That’s cute. Last week you couldn’t even last five. Don’t you remember you were crying on the phone about how bad you wanted to com—_ ”

“Twenty,” Nayeon cuts her off immediately, clearing her throat. She clearly doesn’t need to be reminded. “You have twenty minutes to get here before I lock the doors and take a shower."

“ _Be nice and save some room for one more,_ ” Mina says and Nayeon just knows there’s a smug smile all over her face right now. “ _See you in twenty. Don’t have too much fun without me._ ”

Mina hangs up not even a beat later and Nayeon glances over at Dahyun’s still slumbering body. It sucks that Nayeon will have to kick her out, Dahyun's all cute and cuddly with all her blankets and pillows on top of her, but she kind of wants to get fucked in the shower and she’s sure Dahyun doesn’t want to be privy to that. Unless she’s into that, Nayeon guesses, but that’s another story for another day.

“Dahyun,” she murmurs. “Dahyun, wake up.”

No response.

“Dahyun,” she tries again, voice a little louder. She nudges the girl. “Wake up.”

Dahyun makes a sound, but doesn’t even move. Nayeon rolls her eyes.

“Dahyun, get up.” Nayeon gives up far too quickly, settling for kicking the girl lightly. “You gotta get up.”

“Twenty more minutes,” Dahyun mumbles, wiggling her head underneath a pillow.

“Hell no!” Nayeon kicks her again, this time square in the ass. “Get up!” 

“What?!” Dahyun finally forces herself up with a groan, regarding her more or less with an angry look that looks more sleepy and cute than anything. Nayeon almost wants to pat her on the head. “What the hell, Nayeon?"

“Listen,” Nayeon says. “Mina is coming over and we’ve fucked a bajillion of times on this bed and it’ll be a bajillion and one in twenty minutes, so I kind of need you to go. Like right now.” 

“You are so fucking gross,” Dahyun scowls, throwing the nearest pillow at her. Her hair’s all over the place and she’s blinking the sleep out of her eyes. “Please tell me you washed your sheets.”

“I haven't,” Nayeon lies, wide grin unbelievable in Dahyun’s eyes, “and Mina gets _real_ messy.”

“Oh my god,” Dahyun gags before she shoots out of the bed faster than Nayeon’s ever seen. “You… You’re telling me I slept all over your girl’s… _oh my god_ , I’m burning my clothes when I get home.”

Nayeon’s laugh is loud and dumb, and she hops out of bed and follows after Dahyun to the door. “I’m just kidding! Not about the messy part, but the sheets. Definitely washed. Who do you think I am? I sleep there too!”

“Gross,” is all Dahyun says before she slips on her crocs and huffs. Her arms are crossed and Nayeon can only laugh again, reaching over to smooth out the girl’s hair, blonde strands coming up in cowlicks and everything. Even slips in a head pat. She knows Dahyun well enough to know that she’s not _really_ mad, well, maybe just a smidge, it’s fine. Lunch and maybe a smoothie afterwards will easily have her in the girl’s good graces again.

“Sorry kiddo,” Nayeon supplies, grin sheepish. “I’ll buy you lunch later.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Dahyun rolls her eyes, hand already on the doorknob. “Just figure out what you want to do with this Mina girl now. Woman up and come to terms with your feelings. It’s the twenty-first century for god’s sake, grow a pair and ask her out or something. Any half-conscious idiot can see how much you like her.” 

“Easier said than done,” Nayeon’s smile falters just a little bit, “but I’ll keep it in mind. Thanks for coming over though. I think I needed that talk. You know, to figure things out.”

“I was sleeping for the most part, but you’re welcome,” Dahyun grins and opens the door. Throws up a peace sign as she’s about to leave. “Next time though, please don’t call me again at three in the morning. We can discuss your crises over coffee like normal people during normal people hours."

Nayeon rolls her eyes, but then she’s laughing regardless, waving as Dahyun leaves. “No promises! See you!”

The door closes with a click and the first thing Nayeon does is look at the time on her phone.

12:24 PM. That’s about fifteen minutes until Mina gets here and about five or so until Dahyun texts her saying she got home safely and how much she hates her, once again, for having her coming over at three in the morning and how stupid it was of her to even do it. She’s going to go brush her teeth for two minutes and then be left with thirteen minutes, which means a really great thirteen-minute nap.

She forgoes the shower, though it didn’t take much convincing on her end, her legs seemingly having a mind of their own as they walk her straight back and into her bed. Last time she did, Mina had, unsurprisingly, came in to join her but in the end, Nayeon didn’t get fucked the way she wanted to because Mina accidentally had gotten shampoo in her eyes and was the same dramatic bitch that she usually is, getting water everywhere and causing a ruckus before Nayeon could even come properly. In the end, Nayeon did end up get off one way or another, red-eyed and nearly blind Mina be damned, but it still kind of sucked. Not really the blind(folded) fantasy she’s always wanted, but whatever.

It doesn’t take long for her to fall back asleep, even as Mina texts her not even moments later:

_Ten mins. Hope ur wet :p_

-

“Did you sleep super late or something? At this rate, you’re going to sleep the entire day away.”

Nayeon stirs, barely making out the voice currently talking to her right now. Or at least she thinks it's talking to her. It sounds like it is. It’s a pretty voice.

“Sleepyhead,” she feels a poke at her cheek. “Are you going to get up?”

Nayeon merely puffs her cheeks out and swats the hand away.

“Come on, it’s almost one.” The hand comes to tug at her cheek this time. “It’s not healthy to sleep so much, you know?”

Nayeon groans, cracking an eye open. There, Mina’s hovering above her and pulling at her cheek with an amused grin. If it was any other person, Nayeon would’ve sent a kick flying to their face. But since it’s Mina, all Nayeon can muster is a sleepy, goofy smile as she feels that familiar heat rear up in her chest once again.

“Morning,” she manages, yawns right afterwards, and tries to blink away the sleep that’s still persistent in clinging onto her eyelids.

“Morning again,” Mina leans down close enough to nudge her nose lightly with her own and it does its job in making Nayeon’s heart beat a little faster. “Done sleeping?”

“Depends,” Nayeon says, stretching, and watches the way Mina makes quick work to climb onto the bed with her, or well, on top of her. Her hands are already moving on their own, pushing the blanket out of the way to run down the back of Mina’s thighs. Nayeon, still sleepy-eyed, merely licks her lips as Mina leans in even closer to knock their foreheads together and tells her to keep her hands to herself with a cheeky smile that tells her to do anything but. “Do you have something in mind that’s better than sleeping?”

“I can name a couple things. That’s why I’m here, right?” 

Nayeon can almost feel all her words, can feel Mina’s breath, her mouth dangerously close to hers. Can almost taste it — like vanilla, as usual — and suddenly, all she can think about is kissing everything out of her. 

“Is it? I remember something about strawberry milk and sandwiches,” Nayeon can only murmur out, a little bit too lost in the way Mina’s just right there, right here for her to just take and take, but she’s here doing anything _but_ that.

“We can save those for later,” Mina speaks, hot and airy, and it drives Nayeon insane.

“Okay,” Nayeon says, is all she can say, almost breathlessly, before giving in to the thundering beat beneath her ribs. It’s far too easy, she thinks, when she closes the barely-there distance between them. Nayeon’s not sure if that’s a good or bad thing.

Then, there it is:

It’s vanilla, it’s electricity, it’s fireworks, it’s the rush that bolts through every single one of her veins, it’s the spark Nayeon’s been searching for, it’s the butterflies and the jelly, it’s the single heartbeat that falls in tandem with the way everything starts shifting into all the right places, it’s the moment where everything inside Nayeon just… _clicks._

Just like that.

It feels like melting, feels like ice that crackles down her spine, when the gears in her head start spinning and whirring and clicking so much on their own that she thinks she might start steaming from the ears, when everything and anything just starts making sense. When all the dots connect even though she didn’t connect shit!

A little part wonders if Mina can feel it too, can feel the rapid speed up of her heart underneath her skin, can feel the blood rush or all the sparks and the static and the electricity. _Maybe she can_ , Nayeon thinks when Mina gets a little more insistent, licks tender and hot into her mouth like she _needs_ her, like she wants her as much as Nayeon just might want her, _just_ _maybe she can too._

Are you in love with her? _Yes. I think I am._

Scratch that.

_Yes. I totally am._

-

“Jeongyeon?” The phone feels heavy in her hand.

“ _Dude, I’m playing Smash right now. What the hell do you want?_ ”

“Uh...“

“ _What? Are you okay?_ ”

“Jeongyeon, oh my god—“

“ _Nayeon? You good?_ ”

“I— Jeongyeon, listen to me. Are you listening to me? Pause that game or something. You better be listening to me because I’m only going to say this once.”

A beat of silence follows. She hears shuffling and the noisy clatter of joysticks being put down. “ _Okay… I’m listening._ ”

She swallows, feels that lump stay lodged deep in her throat and refuse to go down. “Uh.. dude, so I was just doing a lot of thinking about life and shit recently and… Jesus, man, I just— I—“

She hears Jeongyeon hum. 

“I… I think I like Mina, man. No, wait, not think, I mean— I like her. No, love her? Like holy shit, Jeongyeon. Mina! Can you believe it? I love her. I’m in love with Myoui Mina!"

Nayeon’s not sure what happens next, but there’s a sudden scream from Jeongyeon's end that is unmistakably Momo and then the line cuts off. Her phone pings immediately afterwards, an onslaught of messages suddenly flooding her screen.

 **Momoring (2:04 PM):** im confused i thought u were dating but just trying to b lowkey abt it ofc u wud love ur own gf lol

 **Momoring (2:10 PM):** wAIT JEONG JUST TOLD ME

 **Momoring (2:10 PM):** NAYEON !!!!!!!!!! JSKDJSKF

 **Momoring (2:10 PM)** : HDHHDHSDSD OMG WAIT

 **Momoring (2:11 PM):** YOU???? MINARI????????

 **Buttface (2:23 PM):** This is still momo but jeongs playing her gmae again and she said to say this

 **Buttface (2:23 PM):** I told you so

-

It isn’t easy when one’s support system is less than helpful, when friends know more about drinking games than how to deal with actual responsibilities.

Don’t get her wrong. She loves Jeongyeon and Momo. They’re her best friends, but they just suck at giving decent advice. It also doesn’t help that neither of them have experienced the tribulations of falling for a girl they explicitly weren't supposed to!

Jeongyeon only tells her to _tell_ Mina. As if it’s _that_ easy. Nope, that’s crossed out of her book already. Momo’s a little bit more dramatic, giving her an entire kdrama-esque scenario for her to profess her affections, five-foot teddy bear, flowers, and fireworks included. Also a big, fat _no_.

It’s just hard, really, hiding her heart from a girl that might know her better than she knows herself. She doesn’t know if it’s something that comes with the realization of her very real and very actual feelings for a girl that probably doesn’t return them or just God screwing her over, but it fucking sucks. It sucks how she has to try her hardest not to send herself into cardiac arrest because her heart has suddenly learned how to shoot off a fuck ton of fireworks at the mere presence of the other girl. It sucks that Nayeon is a perfectly functioning human being that’s capable of having actual feelings for another person that isn’t herself. 

It sucks that the single girl she’s actually managed to admit her feelings for is exactly the one person she shouldn’t be falling for in the first place!

And the suckiest part of it all is that no matter what happens, no matter how many times her stomach gets the jiggles, no matter how many times her heart swells and threatens to burst in her chest — the only remedy for this whole thing is to suck it up and _deal with it._ Anything that has to do with confronting Mina about these _feelings_ is already knocked out of the ballpark. That’s the thing: feelings are _not_ a part of this. _This_ , the entire thing that they are.

You see, Nayeon’s not interested in telling Mina. Not at all. There’s no point in telling Mina because she doesn’t want to ruin whatever’s going on between them. _Hello_ , they’re friends with benefits! They’re not supposed to get attached in the first place. Like yeah, maybe they hang out a lot more than other friends with benefits do and do things that other friends with benefits don't, but that’s just the friend and benefits part at work respectively. They can fuck and take naps together. Go out for sushi and make out with each other. That’s still being friends with benefits. Naps and eating as friends, sex and make out sessions as benefits.

In short, Nayeon’s fine where she is. Really. _Whatever_ her relationship with Mina may be, it’s fine. It’s cool. It’s all good. 

No way in hell _stupid_ feelings are going to get in between that. 

-

Besides, everything’s always been unspoken between them anyway.

Nayeon supposes another thing won’t hurt. 

-

_Haha. Idiot._

As if.

-

Everything changes.

For better or for worse, Nayeon’s not even sure herself.

She starts seeing Mina differently. She starts noticing things that she hasn’t before. She starts feeling a hell lot different. Her stomach twists a lot more these days, reduced to nothing but jelly, and her heart has somehow picked up a habit to hammer uncontrollably against her ribs when Mina’s nearby, or even at the thought of her. She even starts wanting things she knows she can’t have. 

Mina’s always been pretty. Everyone knows this. But _this_ pretty? There’s no way. It’s like the minute Nayeon finally acknowledged her messy ass feelings for Mina, the girl suddenly becomes a hundred times more attractive, even though she was very, _very_ attractive to begin with! It makes no sense, and her mind seems to short circuit a lot these days whenever she sees Mina. The worst part of this whole thing too is that the only thing she ever thinks about lately is: holy hell, she _is_ pretty. 

Honestly, it's nothing really new, but _this_? This is:

She thinks of honey and chocolate, of coffee and cinnamon and caramel and canelés — the prettiest shades of brown. Of strawberries and vanilla, notes of lavender in between. The flowery perfume, the candy sweet of porcelain skin.

She thinks of rose-flushed skin underneath her fingertips, the softest heartbeat that pulses in tandem to her own, the murmur of her name pressed hot upon her skin, the face and the name that makes her stomach feel like jelly and knees all wobbly. 

She thinks of the way her heart beats extra hard against her ribcage when Mina slots their hands together, no reason why, just because she wants to hold hands, or when all the blood in her body rushes straight to her head and she feels like she’s floating. On the clouds and everything!

And the smile. Oh god. _The_ smile.

It’s like snapshots in time, the moments she keeps on repeat on purpose, like a broken record that won’t stop playing in her head no matter how much she wills for it to stop, and it goes a little something like this:

It’s, quite literally, like the sun at the back of her mind. It makes Nayeon’s heart ache with how much it makes her want to burn the sight into her brain. She thinks it might be her new favorite thing. It’s wide, completely teethy, and definitely knows how to reduce Nayeon to a bumbling, red-faced mess. Her nose crinkles in a way that Nayeon never fails to catch, and her eyes curve in the prettiest way ever and all her teeth show, gleaming white against all that pink. Nayeon thinks that God definitely played favorites. It’s not fair.

When she thinks of Mina, she thinks of this. Then everything follows in place. Her heart’s fuzzy and her chest rivets with a warmth like no other. Her blood’s hot beneath her skin and her tummy is all wiggly and wobbly, just like jelly.

This is what it must feel like to be in love. 

Yes. Ascertained. It must be.

-

The sex is different. 

The first time Nayeon notices it is the night of Mina’s showcase. The girl had slapped a free ticket in her face a week prior, and what’s Nayeon gonna do? Say no? It's not like she has anything better to do on a Saturday evening besides binge Netflix or bother Momo and Jeongyeon. Curse Mina for knowing this very well _and_ taking advantage of it!

The Nayeon a year ago would’ve rather died than be caught at a classical dance showcase, let alone some boring ass ballet one. This Nayeon? Literally has no qualms about going in some stuffy dress (that Mina had handpicked for her, of course, because she totally would’ve gone in a dirty hoodie and sweats if she didn’t) and sitting there for two hours, bored out of her fucking mind. Just because Mina _asked_.

(Fucking whipped.)

Unsurprisingly, the showcase is as boring as Nayeon thought it’d be. How a bunch of people prancing across the stage in skin-tight outfits can be considered art is beyond her, by gods. She’s sure the poor boy next to her hates her for almost falling asleep on his shoulder at least five times and counting now, and she's halfway to actually falling into deep sleep, that is, until she catches the sight of Mina back on stage again, this time accompanied by the partner Mina had done nothing but rant about after every practice.

(Which, mind you, Nayeon never ever complains about, since she’s always given the pleasure of a Myoui Mina who’s so deep in the throes of her anger that _whew_ , the relief sex gets ten times better.)

BangBang, or something like that. BamBam? Nayeon didn't care enough to remember then nor does she remember now. Mina had told her he was a foreign exchange student and his name was something everyone couldn’t pronounce even though they all tried, so he made up something he thought was cool even though it was anything but. Mina’s not very fond of him, and Nayeon can kind of see why. The kid even looks like an asshole! With his pompous ass hairdo and annoyingly attractive face to boot! _Men_ , she snorts to herself.

So Nayeon shouldn’t care about him, not at all, not when she knows Mina hates his guts from hell and back.

Their dance starts, and the first thing Nayeon sees is his hands all over Mina. So maybe she does _have_ to care. All traces of sleep leave her immediately, and she almost shoots up from her seat. The boy next to her even gives her a look. When the hell did ballet become so touchy? Something incomprehensible bubbles up inside of Nayeon, and suddenly she regrets trying to even fall asleep throughout this whole showcase. Is this the first time this has happened?

She tries to convince herself that this is what a duet _is_ , especially when the whole thing is implicitly about forbidden lovers, but honestly, it’s easier said than done. Mina hates him — that fact reassures her just a little bit for the quickest minute — but still, the whole thing makes her feel like someone’s just doused her with a bucket of ice cold water and sucker-punched her in the stomach for no reason whatsoever.

It’s not like she’s jealous. Really, she’s _not_ . Pfft, who’s jealous? Not her. _Definitely_ not her. She’s like, uh, probably the last person on earth that’d be jealous. That’s seven billion people before her. See? No way she’s jealous! Not even close.

She isn’t jealous, not at all, but still, she wants to do nothing but run on stage and yank that asshole away from Mina. 

Nayeon just thinks Mina deserves better than that. She doesn’t need BamBam's hands all over her. For one, Nayeon’s hands are a hell lot better. She can even bet that she’d be better at prancing pretentiously across the stage in a leotard better than BamBam himself. 

(Probably not. But she’d _definitely_ look better in the leotard.)

Still, it does anything _but_ quell the sudden burn in her chest.

_It’s just a dance. They’re partners. Just a dance. Partners. Mina’s probably puking internally—_

_Jesus Christ, does his hand have to be there?!_

This night? Just got a thousand times harder.

The boy next to her? He might think she needs to get some help.

Mina? Unbothered and having the absolute time of her life on the stage doing the one thing she loves the most.

BamBam? Still an asshole.

Nayeon? Still definitely _not_ jealous.

-

Nayeon’s leaning against some uncomfortable ass marble pillar off to the side afterwards, when the main reception area is filled with masses and masses of people and Nayeon doesn’t particularly do well with stuffy crowds. Especially not crowds that scream pretentious and filthy rich, the lot of them dancers, really. Her heels are killing her and she feels like she might have to chop both her feet off when she gets back home, _and_ she feels like nothing but a sack of potatoes in this dress. She wants to chuck this purse in the nearest trash can as well. The shit she does for Mina, honestly. 

It’s all a bunch of hustle and bustle around her and Nayeon only catches sight of BamBam and almost all the other dancers all over the place, barely recognizable if it weren’t for all of them still in their performance outfits, but still absolutely no sight of Mina. Half of Nayeon wonders if Mina’s ditched the entire place immediately after everything ended and honestly, she can’t say that she blames her. The other part merely thinks Mina’s just been held back; she's well-known in the dance department anyway, and this was the biggest showcase of the year. It’s not surprising if she's currently being mobbed by her fanclub or something of that caliber. 

Then, as if on cue, there’s a sudden flood of people that file out of one of the doors, with Mina just barely squeezing through the crowd. She looks a little rushed, maybe a little worried too, as her head whips back and forth to scan the entire lobby, like she's trying to find someone, and before she knows it, their gazes eventually lock.

Mina is the first to react when they see each other. Her smile is wide and happy when she meets her gaze, eyes curved, and it’s quick to make Nayeon’s heart jump, thumping loudly in her ears. Her smile is big in return — might be too wide, maybe a little too bunny-toothed — and her wave is tiny, fingers shaky. _Geez, get it together, Nayeon!_

Mina’s still in her outfit from her last performance, though with her ballet shoes traded for beat up sneakers instead, and there’s a multitude of bouquets in her arms. A teddy bear stuffed in there, too! They’re huge and beautiful and probably cost a fortune each and suddenly Nayeon feels super self-conscious. The flowers she’s reminded herself at least fifty times to buy before coming can’t even compare, really, and somehow even an obviously wilting tulip in one of Mina’s many bouquets does its job in making her flowers seem extra shitty in its proximity. Jesus, what was she thinking? Of course Mina would get flowers that cost more than Nayeon’s entire existence, and of course they’re all so stinking spectacular and prettier than anything Nayeon’s ever seen because Mina doesn’t deserve any less. Of course.

She clutches the flowers in her hand a little tighter and tucks them behind her back as Mina ignores a call for her from behind and makes her way toward her, even thinking of throwing them off to some dark, nondescript corner before Mina can even see them. It’s not like she’d want them anyway, not when she currently has an entire two million dollar flower shop in her arms. 

“Hey you,” Mina says, stopping directly in front of her. Still, her smile is bright. Still, Nayeon’s heart is on fire.

“Hey you back.” she works a grin in return. "Finally got away from your rabid fangirls?"

"Be nice," Mina casts a glance back toward the gathering of people now crowding around the other dancers, “they’re just very, very… very excited."

“So basically rabid—"

Mina shoots her a glare and Nayeon shuts up immediately, opting for a cheeky smile instead.

“I’m surprised,” Mina says, “I thought you’d either be a no show or still be asleep in the auditorium.”

“Wow, Mina. Is that really what you think of me?”

“Coming from someone who thinks ballerinas are just really kind people whose sole purpose of dancing is to send other people to sleep, yes," Mina grins, all teeth, "and don't think I didn't see you dozing off the entire time."

"I wasn't dozing off! You just have bad timing and only saw me when I was resting my eyelids for the longest second ever."

Mina rolls her eyes, but she’s laughing nonetheless. There’s a thrum deep in her heart at the sight, and Nayeon thinks her heart wants to shoot out of her chest, straight into the arms of the girl that’s got her name written all over it. How awfully cliché.

“Yeah?” Mina’s looking at her in a way that definitely isn’t healthy for her. Nayeon doesn’t even know how she’s still managing to stand upright when everything’s starting to feel like jelly.

“Yeah.”

A stretch of silence follows and Nayeon can only stare, albeit shyly. It’s kind of awkward in ways that it shouldn’t be, but still nothing uncomfortable. They’re _way_ past that point already.

“Oh!” She suddenly exclaims. She’s reminded of the flowers in her hands when she realizes her palms are insanely sweaty for absolutely no other reason than one thing: Myoui goddamn Mina. 

You know what, fuck it.

What’s she got to lose anyway? Nothing, really. It’s not like Mina was expecting her to get her flowers or something. It’s not like Mina will think any differently of her just because she did. If anything, Mina will probably just think she actually has manners and is being a decent friend. 

“Um, these… these are for you,” she sticks her arm straight out in front of Mina’s face, even feels a little embarrassed as she once again catches sight of the multitude of bouquets already in Mina’s arms. Screw it, it’s not like she wants to take the flowers home with her when they’d die the minute they get past her front door and their sole purpose of being here today were for Mina in the first place, “but… like, you don’t have to take them since you have so many already and they honestly look like shi—“

Mina cuts off her words by doing exactly opposite of what she was thinking, immediately taking the bouquet from her hands, doing so faster than Nayeon can even comprehend _and_ with all the flowers already on her. “Thank you, Nayeon,” she says, shyly almost, and her smile is so goddamn beautiful and so genuine and so _Mina_ that it easily dupes Nayeon into thinking that she might actually mean it. “I love them. Really.”

Nayeon’s "you’re welcome” and quiet and maybe a little shy its own way. Mina doesn’t say anything about it. She feels the tips of her ears starting to burn hot. 

“Thank you for coming, too,” Mina hugs the flowers a little closer to her. "You— Nayeon, you have no idea how much it means to me.” 

“I skipped binge-watching the newest season of Stranger Things for this, so thank _you_ , Mina, for not letting me waste my Saturday evening being a five-star bum,” Her smile is toothy and Mina makes a face of disapproval. “I’m kidding. I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. Really.”

There’s a burn that settles in the back of her chest at her words, when they’re the reason that makes Mina’s nose scrunch up in that one way it does, and then there’s that one smile all over her face, the one that’s all sorts of gummy and never fails to make Nayeon’s heart run. Nayeon feels a goofy smile on her face in return, so wide and so dumb that she thinks she might wake up with a sore face tomorrow.

Nayeon clears her throat, shaking both of them out of… whatever that was. Mina’s gaze shifts and Nayeon suddenly can’t focus on anything that isn’t the floor. “Uh… wanna get out of here? I’m starving and Jeongyeon and Momo just bought a hundred piece box of chicken strips that they definitely can’t finish and I don’t think I can stand another minute in this dress.”

Mina looks apologetic almost immediately. “I really want to but...” she sends a glance back behind her. There, Sana’s waiting along with a couple of people Nayeon vaguely remembers as Mina's fellow dance friends from a different university. Hell, they all have their own flowers to give as well! Nonetheless, Nayeon sees Sana practically bouncing in her spot out of pure excitement and she even sends her a small wave, which the other girl has no problem returning. Mina always says Sana acts more puppy than human, and Nayeon, who was nothing but doubt in the very beginning, is starting to see it now. “Plus, I have to help clean up later so I’ll be here late and I don’t want to make you wait up for me. Sorry, Nayeon.”

“Oh, well, uh— don’t worry about it, really, it’s no problem,” Nayeon manages. Of course Mina’s got loads and loads of people to talk to and thank afterwards. Of course Mina’s not going to drop everything on possibly the most important night to her in this entire year to go out with her, Im Nayeon out of all people, for some goddamn chicken strips. She feels like her head isn't screwed on properly these days — what is she even thinking? "I should... uh, go... I don’t want to hold you any longer, and Sana looks like she’s ready to explode if she doesn’t talk to you right this instant.”

Mina works a small smile, but it still has sorry written all over it. “Ice cream tomorrow? My treat.”

“Deal.” She shuffles in her spot. "I’ll see you.”

Mina gives her one last smile before she turns on her heels, already making a beeline toward her friends. Nayeon’s mouth chooses the wrong moment to work faster than her brain. “Wait, Mina!”

Mina’s head whips back behind as she immediately stops in her tracks, brows furrowed and gaze confused. “Yes?”

“I forgot to say thank you."

“What? For what?"

"Thank you for wearing that tutu. It does _wonders_ for your ass.”

Mina looks like she wants to kill her on the spot, red spilling across her cheeks and head frantically whipping left and right to make sure no one was close enough to hear her. Nayeon nearly doubles over out of pure laughter.

“I’m kidding,” she manages between laughs. “Not really actually, but you know what I mean. I just wanted to say… I don’t know, I thought you looked beautiful tonight.”

Beautiful is possibly the biggest understatement on Earth for the likes of Mina. Mina, with her sparkly makeup, pink lipgloss, bow-tied hair, and even that pompous ass tutu. Mina, who wears _her_ sweats on the weekends and has cheesy Doritos dust all over her shirt enough times to consider it normal, but it’s all still enough for Nayeon to think she’s the prettiest girl on Earth, glitter or cheese dust be damned!

The look Mina gives her is indescribable. The feeling she gives her is even worse. Her heart grows impossibly bigger in her chest in tandem to the feeling that settles itself in her stomach, like butterflies and jelly all rolled into one. It’s a terrible combination, really, and it does nothing but make the fireworks go off in the back of her head and her knees weak and every single neuron in her brain short-circuits in that very moment and the only thing she can even think of is _oh my god, I’m really, really, really in love with her_.

-

It’s a little past one in the morning when Nayeon hears the door unlock, along with the sound of a duffel bag being dropped to the ground. Her eyelids beg to stay shut, but she shakes herself awake anyway, convincing herself that she slept on a kitchen island once in her life already, and that a second time is definitely not a good idea. She picks up the faint mutter of “oh man, did I leave the lights on all day?” as the sound of footsteps get closer and closer and Mina finally comes into view.

Mina’s wide-eyed and she jumps when she sees her, falling back and onto the floor with a yelp and a resounding _thud!_

Nayeon bursts into laughter almost immediately. Nayeon comes over all the time, especially at ungodly hours of the day and definitely way past eleven. Most of the time because she’s horny and can’t sleep, but it’s all the same thing. Mina shouldn’t even be scared at this point.

“Nayeon! What the hell!” 

“Oh my god,” Nayeon can’t stop laughing, even as she immediately shoots out of her seat to help Mina up. “Are you okay?” 

Mina doesn’t answer her, settling for smacking her repeatedly on the arm instead. “Ow! Ow! Ow! Okay, Mina— Ow!”

After Mina's done beating her up and rendering her arm useless for the rest of the night, Nayeon’s sulky as she slinks back into her seat and Mina merely sends her a hmph and a “serves you right” glare.

“Are you going to tell me what you’re doing here?” Mina asks a beat later, like she didn’t just want to box Nayeon into the next day, leaning against the kitchen island. Nayeon knows Mina isn’t mad, far from, but she can’t help but feel sheepish at her words anyway. “It’s late and I told you I didn’t want you waiting for me.”

Nayeon forgoes an answer, rubbing her arm with a pout and eyes settling on a plastic bag in front of her. Mina follows her gaze, suddenly curious. Her mouth opens to ask what it is, but Nayeon beats her to it.

“Did you eat?” Nayeon asks.

Mina’s quick to change demeanor, going from wanting to jump Nayeon on the spot to wanting to run away from Nayeon right this instant. The look Mina has on her face only confirms her suspicions. She just _knew_ Mina would do anything and everything for everyone else and barely have the time to think of herself until the literal end of the day.

“Well, I was going to make a peanut butter sandwich…” Mina pipes up quietly as she settles in the seat next to Nayeon. She looks like a child who just got caught doing something she wasn’t supposed to, wide eyes and twiddling thumbs and all. It makes Nayeon’s heart twist. _Goddammit, Mina! There’s no way it’s possible for you to be this cute! This shit has to be illegal!_

“You were out the entire day for your showcase and you even stayed behind to help clean up,” Nayeon says, brow raised, “and you were just going to eat a peanut butter sandwich after all that?”

“Uh,” Mina’s smile is sheepish and tired, “yeah?”

Nayeon can only shake her head and reach over to open the plastic bag. She makes quick work to plate the food and chuck it in the microwave. Mina only watches silently. She looks pouty whenever Nayeon glances over every now and then and she has to remind herself not to stare too long because then she might want to kiss her and then Mina would never get to eat.

Seconds later, a plate is set down in front of Mina, along with a ketchup bottle and a generous stack of napkins. A glass of cola follows right after.

It’s a burger that kind of looks like it’s been hit with a baseball bat at least ten times and a side of beyond soggy fries. Well, at least it’s hot.

“A burger?” Mina asks, giving Nayeon a look. “Nayeon, it’s one in the morning. It’s too late to be eating something so heavy.”

“And?” Nayeon looks like she wouldn’t take no for an answer or let Mina go anywhere if she doesn’t eat. “Your stomach can’t tell time and I _know_ you barely ate all day.”

Mina gives in without a fight at all. She only sighs as she picks up a fry that doesn’t look as soggy as the others, gives it a generous dip of ketchup, and pops it right in her mouth. Nayeon takes this time to watch her carefully, her cheek propped up against her palm.

There’s still glitter here and there on Mina's face, and her hair’s tied up into a messy ponytail. Her shoulders droop and she looks beyond tired and suddenly a part of Nayeon wants to do nothing but tuck her into bed and let her sleep for days. She’s switched her puffy pink tutu and skintight leotard for a pair of sweats and a hoodie that’s unsurprisingly _and_ unmistakably Nayeon’s as well. 

“I’ve been craving for so long actually,” Mina says after one big bite. Her shoulders relax in content.

Nayeon knows. Mina bitched about it all last week and even part of this week, how she swears she can down four cheeseburgers in one sitting but can’t because she has to make sure her tutu still fits for the showcase. Nayeon, again as usual, only tells her she’s being way too dramatic, that four cheeseburgers wouldn’t do a thing to Mina _and_ that she can eat whatever the hell she wants and whenever she wants, but still commits the little mention to memory. Nonetheless, Mina looks satisfied, despite her earlier protests, and Nayeon feels warm inside.

“Wasn’t this kind of far though?”

“Nah, I was just in the area, so I thought why not,” Nayeon says, not: "it was a twenty minute walk because it’s on the other side of town and I was definitely not even close to being in the area but I remembered you saying you wanted a burger for the longest time so I, being as whipped as I am, went to get you a damn burger.” 

Nayeon swears she could just sit here and watch Mina eat for days on end like a total idiot, but it’s only then that she realizes something. She perks up in her seat. “Mina, where’d all your flowers go? Did you throw them all away?” 

Knowing how many she got to begin with, she probably did. Nayeon can’t blame her. She probably would’ve done the same thing.

“No,” Mina wipes her mouth. “I dropped all of them off at Sana’s. I wanted to bring them all back, but I just didn’t have enough space. Besides, I’m no good at taking care of flowers either. I think I’d kill them all in a day.”

“Oh,” Nayeon nods. “That makes sense. You did up killing Chonny anyw—"

Mina shoots her a glare, which shuts Nayeon up immediately. Chonny, dutifully named by Mina and also the cutest little potted cacti ever, had unfortunately succumbed to his injuries shortly after Mina decided to get piss ass drunk one night and puke all over the poor guy. Nayeon ended up buying Mina a new one anyway, after countless nights of her bitching and crying about how she should’ve just vomited on Nayeon instead of Chonny, but it just isn’t the same, really. The new one, named Francesca, is real cute in her own way, with a little flower on top of her and everything, but she’ll never be able to replace Chonny in Nayeon’s heart. 

“But,” Mina says anyway, picking something up from the seat next to her, “I brought these bad boys home with me.”

There, in Mina’s hand, the lackluster bouquet she had gotten for her stands tall and proud, even though half of the flowers look kind of beat up and definitely missing a lot of petals.

_Oh._

Nayeon’s cheeks feel hot, yet the feeling that blooms in her chest is unmistakable.

“You only kept my flowers because you wanted to kill them right in front of my face, didn’t you? Ouch, my heart hurts,” Nayeon says, words betraying her feelings easily. Her heart is nothing _but_ happy. Practically somersaulting and destroying everything else in her chest.

She tries to tell herself that it doesn’t mean anything, that just because Mina chose to bring home _her_ flowers out of all the other bouquets she received means nothing, that she probably only picked her bouquet because it was the smallest and the one that’ll take up the least space, that Mina probably just wanted to bring _something_ back from the recital and Nayeon’s shitty flowers just happen to be that. But even then, there’s the tiniest sliver of hope and sprouts deep within her heart that tells her it might mean _something_. Even if that something is just wanting to kill the flowers because they’re Nayeon’s.

“So out of all the fancy bouquets you’ve received, my beat up one managed to win your heart, huh?”

Mina’s laugh is soft. She’s staring directly at Nayeon, smashed burger in her hands and tired eyes and all, and it makes Nayeon warm all over. Her heart is _this_ close to floating away. “Yeah, something like that, I guess.”

-

There must’ve been something in that burger, really. 

After Mina had washed up, all semblances of being tired had apparently left her immediately. She had promptly laid down next to Nayeon in bed and announced very loudly to her (and Jeongyeon, who was unfortunately on the phone at the time) that she was horny and either Nayeon fucks her right now or she’s going to get kicked out. Doesn’t even give a shit that it’s currently two in the morning and the only thing Nayeon’s been ready for was an upcoming twelve hours of sleep. 

It’s all a bunch of unintelligible yelling from Jeongyeon on the other end, a “do you guys really just talk like that regularly?!” slipped in there as well, before Nayeon hangs up abruptly, connects her phone to Mina’s bluetooth speaker and opens Spotify as fast as she can. Then tosses her phone off to only god knows where.

Nayeon knows showcase week was utter hell for Mina, having been the butt end of all of Mina’s endless ranting for twenty-four hours, seven days straight. Ideally, Nayeon would’ve rather screwed Mina’s brains out than let her drone on and on about how this whole thing’s got her stressed from hell and back and if she fucks up, then her dancing career might be potentially over forever. Nayeon hadn’t been much of a help, if she’s being honest herself, having done nothing but offer terrible words of advice (because “if you don’t know what you’re doing, just wing it!” is anything but good advice to say to Mina in the midst of her annual showcase crisis) and let Mina beat her around as much as she needed. It’s the least she could do when she’s _not_ doing the one thing she’s good at: fucking the brains out of Mina.

It’s a good thing Mina trusts her enough to tell her everything on her mind and she appreciates it, however, but she didn’t know it would’ve cost her an entire week of abstinence. If she had known, then maybe she would’ve pushed her “screw the brains out of Mina” agenda a little more, just to get Mina to stop being such a dramatic bitch, but never mind that. Stress sex isn’t ever the best sex, and Mina’s basically begging for her to fuck her right here and right now anyway and Nayeon? Nayeon’s never one to say no. _Especially_ to Myoui Mina.

Nayeon’s quick to make work. Her jacket’s shrugged off and she even kicks her socks off as fast as she can before Mina grabs her by her shirt collar and pulls her in for a kiss she’d be sure to feel well into tomorrow. Horny Mina is hardly a rarity, but her patience is reduced to nearly nothing compared to Normal Mina. One instance with a terribly timed Mobile Legends match was the first and last time Nayeon would ever dare test that. 

It’s far from ideal — Nayeon had nearly kneed Mina in the stomach when she clamored on top of her as quick as she could — and all of the blankets and pillows Mina swears she needs to sleep with or else are getting in the way and the music Nayeon’s put on as background noise isn’t even from the _right_ sex playlist. The sheets prove themselves to be a hassle as well, and it sticks to her skin when Nayeon pins her down, fingers easily sliding underneath her shirt and lips already against hers once again.

“I don’t even know why you bothered putting on clothes,” Nayeon pulls away for the fastest second, pulling her shirt over her head in one go and immediately dropping back low to pepper kisses down the stretch of her neck and leaving a bite or two here and there. At least Mina was smart enough to save her the trouble of a bra.

“And let you have everything without working for it?” Mina laughs, but it’s breathy as Nayeon drags her mouth further down, planting kisses all over her breasts. “You wish.”

“I knew it,” Nayeon’s busy working her fingers underneath the waistband of Mina’s shorts as her lips close around a nipple, “that fucking tutu changed you.”

Mina seems like she’s done talking to her. Instead, there’s a pretty gasp from her throat and then she’s pulling at a fistful of Nayeon’s hair. Nayeon’s always been a biter, and her teeth catch in all the ways that make Mina whimper. The marks she leaves on her skin are red and hot and definitely the kind that’ll purple and mottle by tomorrow morning, but Mina has bigger worries in life.

Which, in the simplest terms, is: get Nayeon to fuck her _now_ or she’s getting her ass kicked. Literally and out of the door.

Nayeon’s all teeth and tit sucking and absolutely no fingering or fucking or anything of the sort and it makes Mina mad. Nayeon isn’t normally one to beat around the bush, definitely not when she’s got a girl like Mina writhing so, _so_ prettily underneath her and basically begging to be fucked, but something in her just _clicks_ . Like she should take her time or something stupid like that, rile Mina up and everything. You know, something Mina _doesn’t_ want her doing. The handful of hair Mina yanks harder the next second is enough of an indication.

“Chill out,” Nayeon murmurs against her tit, easing in a tiny nibble that makes Mina whimper. “I’m getting there. Don’t worry.”

“Getting there now or in the next fifty years?” Mina manages, even as Nayeon’s fingers move to the place that has her breath catching in her throat. There’s a press that makes her hips buck. “I’m not kidding about kicking your ass out. I don’t care what time it is.”

“Quit being so feisty, Mina,” Nayeon laughs against her skin. “It’s not as sexy as you think.”

Nayeon just knows Mina has some snark on the tip of her tongue ready for her, and frankly, she doesn’t want to hear it. She moves quickly to slot her lips against Mina’s before she can even try to get words out at her, deciding that _fuck it_ , Mina’s good at getting what she wants from her without doing anything, really, and slips her hand into her panties easily.

Nayeon’s quick to fumble with her clit, fingers moving in neat circles. The sounds Mina makes are too good, _so_ good, and it makes Nayeon preen. Her lips are hot against Mina’s jawline, sloppy open-mouthed kisses pressed to any expanse of skin she can touch, before she’s back to kissing Mina square on the mouth. 

“Please, just— fuck, Nayeon, fuck,” Mina whines against her mouth, cheeks flooding with color and hips incessant against her hand. She even looks a little teary-eyed. “Please. Need _you_.”

This, however? This is the exact moment that Nayeon falls apart.

Nayeon blames it on the heat of the moment: the way Mina’s chest heaves as she tries to clear the oxygen debt Nayeon’s given her, eyes lidded and clouded with nothing but need, face ruddy and lips swollen in the way she likes the most. That, and the fact that they haven’t had sex in a little more than a week, perhaps. But details, _details._

She tries her hardest to not let it get to her head, the fact that before, this was all about getting Mina off as fast and as good as she can. But now? It’s a little something different. To Mina, this might be _just_ sex, but to Nayeon? Holy fuck, it’s all about Mina. She thinks it might’ve _always_ been Mina. Now, Nayeon can’t help but feel her heart puff up tenfold, like a balloon pressing up against all the nooks and crannies of her ribcage, when she watches Mina, watches how her body presses so intimately against hers, how _so_ fucking beautiful she is. 

“Okay,” is all she says, all she can manage to say, settling for kissing a blaze down Mina’s torso. Mina whimpers when she eases her fingers away but she’s quick to shush her, kiss harsh against her navel as her fingers hook themselves at the waistband of Mina’s sweatpants and panties, working them down with practiced ease.

She’s taking her time on purpose, and relishes in the way Mina’s desperately trying to keep her impatience at bay, ankles digging into her sides. There’s a bruising kiss pressed to Mina’s inner thigh and her mouth waters positively at the sight, Mina spread out so obscenely in front of her, all for her _and_ only for her. Mina’s lack of patience aside, she can’t help but take a second to admire the mess she’s made between Mina’s legs.

“Look at you,” Nayeon nearly purrs against her. Mina’s hips jerk. “Look how wet you are, dripping all over your bed. You’re making a mess, Mina.” 

“Nayeon,” Mina grits out. Her fingers scratch at Nayeon’s scalp as she resists the urge to jam her knee into Nayeon’s face. “ _Please_."

There’s another bite at her inner thigh, hard and wet, which only spurs a more resounding ache deep in her core. Nayeon’s so insistent on marking her up that Mina nearly lets her have at it, letting the girl press as many kisses and bites where ever she wants. 

“Nayeon,” Mina manages, once more, a lot more whiny than before and Nayeon only hums.

“I got you,” Nayeon murmurs, breath dangerously hot against her core. Mina’s thighs tremble as Nayeon hooks her arms around them, and the first contact she makes with Mina nearly has the poor girl crying.

It’s nothing pretty — all gasps and whimpers, all wet and messy — as Mina rocks against her mouth and pulls at her hair a little harder to get her impossibly closer. In turn, Nayeon only licks a little harder, a little hotter, and has to move her hands to keep Mina’s hips steady before they break something in her face.

The sounds Mina makes, whiny and desperate, only drives Nayeon further as she lets herself fall into everything that is Mina. Mina’s hand relinquishes its death grip at her hair and snakes down to grasp at hers, and she lets her fingers fit into the gaps between Mina’s, perfectly and with ease, even as she’s currently eating her out like absolutely nobody’s business.

“Do you want to come?” Nayeon whispers against her skin, makes Mina feel all of her words. Mina doesn’t — _can’t_ — say anything so she only nods, frantically, thighs threatening to close around Nayeon’s head as she tries to work herself harder against her mouth. 

Nayeon, under normal circumstances, would’ve laughed in Mina’s face and never let her have it unless she begged. Needy and teary Mina is easily one of Nayeon’s top 10 favorite Minas after all, but nonetheless, Nayeon feels her heart grow within her chest, filling up all the empty space within the cavity of her chest, when she allows herself a single moment to see Mina. _See_ her.

Mina’s face is a brilliant shade of red all the way through, ruddy down to her neck, and she’s squeezing Nayeon’s hand so hard that her knuckles turn white. Her eyes are lidded, and her chest rises and falls with an intensity that only increases the more Mina tries to press herself harder and harder, only to have Nayeon patting at her hipbone to let up a little bit. Her skin’s littered with bites and marks in a way Nayeon likes the best, and her back is arched with the flexibility that only a ballerina is capable of. 

It’s not much, really, but it’s Nayeon’s _everything_.

Mina’s so goddamn lucky Nayeon’s so hopelessly in love with her that she’ll give her at least this. 

It doesn’t take long, especially since Mina’s been wound up so tight for the entirety of this past week of all-dance-and-no-sex-whatsoever, so when she comes, it’s so wet and so beautiful, how all the tiny sounds come from Mina’s throat only during these times, how her hips manage work in that tiny grind afterwards to chase after the fleeting seconds of pleasure that she can milk from the moment. 

“There you go,” Nayeon presses on, even manages another lick to make sure everything’s pooled on her tongue, and Mina’s hips get jumpy. Mina makes a noise that sounds like she’s crying. “That’s it, baby. You’re doing _so_ good.”

Mina’s hand scratches at her scalp lightly and Nayeon moves to press her cheek against her inner thigh, catching Mina’s tired gaze on her. She licks her lips, watches the way Mina swallows thickly at the sight, and decides all too quickly in one go that she isn’t done with Mina. Not yet. Not like Mina is either, but _still_.

She’s quick to move, pushing herself up to brush noses for the briefest second before she’s dead-set on the idea of kissing all the air out of Mina’s lungs. She had planned on taking at least a little bit of time to work up Mina once again, maybe tweak her tits a bit until she’s leaking all over her sheets again, but Mina seems to have other plans already. Her hand grasps her wrist almost harshly, and she’s already pushing her fingers down to the place where she needs her the most and oh _boy,_ she’s so wet already again. 

Nayeon doesn’t even get her mouth down to Mina’s neck before she slips one, then two fingers into Mina and she caves almost immediately, mouth dropping open. Nayeon swallows that moan right up. 

“Fuck,” Nayeon says against her pulse point, sloppy, and her fingers press a little deeper. “Fuck, Mina.”

Mina gasps, red-faced, as she claws her fingers down Nayeon’s back. Nayeon works her hand a little more earnestly and takes this chance to _really_ look at Mina, gaze fluttering all over her figure once again.

Sex is filthy, but Myoui Mina manages to turn it into a goddamn art form. _Fucking hell, Michelangelo would’ve never been able to replicate this. The Pietà_ _can eat my ass._

It’s all patchy and mismatched at most, really, but Nayeon kind of needs Mina to come as much as Mina needs herself to come right now. Doesn’t matter if Nayeon’s fucking her optimally or not. Her wrist might cramp any second from now and she might even get herself carpal tunnel, but all of that doesn’t fucking matter — Mina’s the prettiest when she’s falling apart so, so desperately around her fingers. Nayeon’s mouth is already watering.

Mina’s making a lot more sounds at this point, still sensitive as ever and mewling and all squirmy underneath her and Nayeon just _knows_ , knows she’s almost there, just a little bit more and—

Mina comes, easily, and Nayeon takes it all in, fucks her right through it and lets her ride it out for as long as she can.

This time, Mina even cries. She’s all red faced and teary eyed, breathing shallow and legs shaky. The tears are hot down her cheeks as Nayeon’s thumb works the bundle of nerves a little harder, squeezing in that last bit of overstimulation that Mina likes the best, and the desperate sob Mina lets out is nothing but delicious. Nayeon almost comes at the fucking sound of it.

“You’re okay,” Nayeon says, kissing away all of Mina’s tears. The girl underneath her is all sniffles and tiny sounds as Nayeon pulls her fingers out slowly, hesitates for a few seconds, eyes flickering back and forth between a tear-laden Mina and her slick fingers, before she cleans off her fingers by herself and takes in the way Mina watches her and how obscene all of it is. Then, she’s back to rubbing the remainder of Mina’s tears away. 

“You’re okay,” Nayeon repeats verbatim, chest heaving and skin hot as she presses her forehead against Mina’s. “You’re okay. I’m here."

Mina’s heart twists in a way she can’t describe, but the thought of it goes as fast as it comes. Nayeon grins — all teeth — and kisses her and she forgets. 

-

Impulse, for a lack of a better word, is perilous.

Everything comes after a night of grilled meat and one too many shots of soju. She smells like grease, reeks of the alcohol that she spilled all over her shirt earlier and downed enough for it to seep from her skin. She’s drunk enough to lose her footing every now and then, but not drunk enough to say she ended up at Mina’s door without a purpose, or so that’s what she tells herself.

She forgoes knocking politely, settling for basically slamming her fists incessantly against the wood. A sleepy Mina opens the door almost minutes later, brows knitted down in absolute irritation and a flurry of profanities ready at the tip of her tongue, that is, until she realizes it’s none other than Im Nayeon with perhaps the dopiest smile she’s ever seen on her face.

“Nayeon? What are you doing here?”

“Hi!” she perks up immediately, though her words are slurred, “Mina? Is that you? When’d you get so pretty?”

“... _And_ you’re drunk,” Mina sighs, reaches out to take a hold of Nayeon’s forearms the second she starts to wobble. “God, how much did you drink?”

Nayeon grins, wide and toothy. “Not a lot, just a few bottles!”

Mina rolls her eyes, tugging the girl inside. “Come on, it’s late and you’re drunk. You need to go to bed.” 

“Already?” Nayeon questions. “Aren’t we going too fast?”

Mina shoots a glare back at the girl who only laughs loudly, cheeks flushed red. She leads them back to her room, where she grabs Nayeon by the shoulders and makes her sit down on the edge of the bed. “Stay,” she says, warily.

“Where else can I go? In the closet?” Nayeon sways in her spot, maybe a little far too drunk to be making sense at this point. “I’ve been out for years already, Mina!”

Mina rolls her eyes yet again, gives her another pointed “stay,” before she’s out the room. Nayeon’s sober enough to do so, though she does have a drunken fit of laughter when she manages to kick her sneakers off on her own, one of them flying across Mina’s room and hitting the wall with a pronounced _thump_! (“Mina, my shoe! It can bounce!”)

Mina doesn’t take long, returning back with a glass full of water and a bottle of painkillers. “Here, drink this,” she says, foregoing handing it to Nayeon, and bringing the edge of the glass up to her lips for her instead.

Nayeon, thankfully, obeys without much of a word. She manages to even finish all of it, which satisfies Mina in the least, but there are still more pressing issues at hand: getting the girl into bed. Mina’s dealt with a drunk Nayeon before, perhaps more than once, if the number of calls she gets in a single night when Nayeon decides it’s a great idea to go drinking on a school night, always saying it’s thirsty Thursdays or something of that sort. Drunk Nayeon, for one, does not like sleeping. 

She sets the empty glass and painkillers on the nightstand before going off to fetch a change of clothes for Nayeon. “Can you change by yourself?”

Nayeon’s response is merely a noncommittal hum, and she’s already fallen back toward the bed without much more of a sound nor word. Mina thinks she didn’t even hear her. Mina sighs for the nth time tonight and Nayeon rolls onto her stomach, limbs flailing. 

“Come on, you big baby,” she swats at her ass, “get up. Let’s get you changed.”

Drunk Nayeon, Mina learns this time, doesn’t like to listen either.

It takes at least ten minutes for Mina to even manage to get Nayeon’s shirt off of her, and even then, Nayeon’s still drunk enough to act scandalized about it. As if the first time Mina had _really_ met her, unsurprisingly so, didn’t entail having her shirt off. Her pants are a little easier, with Nayeon actually very eager to get them off, though she vehemently refuses to put on a pair of pajama pants, nearly kicking Mina in the face when she tries. Mina decides she’s too tired to even attempt a second time, so she leaves her be, oversized shirt and panties and all. It’s not like it matters, Nayeon’s definitely slept with _a lot_ less before anyway. 

Nayeon immediately sticks to her side when she makes her way into bed, arms tucked around her body and face already pressed into the crook of her neck. She still smells like a generous helping of alcohol, followed by hints of her mint shampoo, and Mina can’t help but to press a tiny kiss against Nayeon’s forehead, purely out of impulse, an arm wrapping around the girl and pulling her closer. 

She feels that subtle speed up of her heart, when Nayeon starts pressing tiny kisses against her skin in return, along with some tiny, drunken blown raspberries thrown in here and there. Her cheeks fill with heat, and she almost wants to get up and slap herself back to reality. Myoui Mina? Acting all juvenile over a couple of kisses? From Im Nayeon out of all people? _The_ Im Nayeon that doubles up as the _only_ girl she’s acquainted with for the mere purpose of sex? A couple kisses, with clearly no carnal intention, shouldn’t reduce her into bumbling school girl. _Jesus, Mina, what’s with you? You’ve seen this girl naked more times than you can count, for god’s sake. And you’re blushing because she’s drunk and kissing you? Bonkers, it’s absolutely raving bonkers!_

“Mina?”

She clears her throat, her thoughts dispersing immediately when Nayeon breaks the silence. “Yes?”

“You’re warm,” Nayeon murmurs, and then laughs merely a second later. Presses another kiss to Mina’s neck. Still drunk. “I like it. I like you.”

“Yeah?” Nayeon’s kisses tickle and Mina laughs a little too, the ends of her laughter soft from the sleep starting to tug at her edges. “You’re warm, too. I think you had a little too much to drink, but that’s okay. I like it too. I like you too.”

Nayeon doesn’t say anything else afterwards. Mina likes to think it’s because the alcohol’s finally making her sleepy. Finally.

“Mina,” Nayeon says not even a beat later. Right, Nayeon never falls asleep that fast. “Are you still awake?"

Mina shifts a little. “Yes.”

“Can I tell you something? It’s a secret.”

Mina deliberates for a few seconds. “Are you sure, Nayeon? You’re drunk.”

“I don’t know,” Nayeon says, soft. “I just really want to tell you. Can I?”

Mina supposes it won’t hurt. It can’t be anything bad. The last time Nayeon told her a secret, it was the fact that she still sleeps with a pink teddy bear she’s had since she was five. It technically wasn’t even a secret, really, because it’s the only stuffed animal she keeps on her bed and once, Nayeon had promptly pressed Mina down onto her bed, ready to take her then and there, but had stopped abruptly because she had to put her teddy bear someplace else that wasn’t going to be defiled right in front of its innocent eyes. 

“Sure, why not,” Mina replies, eyes on the verge of drooping close. Nayeon’s just so, so warm and it’s lulling her to sleep so, so easily.

A beat of silence. Nayeon scoots herself impossibly closer, body warm and pressing so intimately against hers. 

“Mina?"

Mina forgoes a verbal answer, merely humming. It’s something along the lines of “yes, I’m here, I’m still awake and listening, but I’m about to pass out and I’m too tired to say anything else.”

“I think I’m in love with you.”

Mina feels her heart stop. It’s merely a whisper, perhaps even something less than that, and Mina thinks she would’ve completely missed it if her heart had beat a little louder in that very second. Silence follows yet again, and Nayeon lets out a tiny snore minutes later.

Something in Mina’s stomach flips. She has no idea what it is.

-

When Nayeon wakes up in the morning, her head is on fire, her mouth is dry, and her entire body is warm. The first thing she does is try to get up, but even that is proven impossible, with the arms locked around her body and nearly another body on top of her. 

She knows well enough that this is not her room, bleary-eyed and all, and a part of her is thankful that she didn’t end up crashing on someone’s floor, or even worse, somewhere on the ground outside. The bed is really comfortable and so is the person with her right now, and it really doesn’t seem like a bad idea to go back to sleep. Her eyelids droop close once again when she feels the other body press a little closer to her and it feels nothing but comfortable, almost like she belongs here. 

Wait.

Her eyes fly back open and her heart rams itself against her ribcage. Did she— did she sleep with someone?!

She knows that she’s got a shirt on, and it reassures her the tiniest amount that her drunken self had some form of decency, but the very obvious lack of pants can only mean _one_ thing. Oh god, just kill her now. The prospect of Nayeon getting completely shit-faced and proceeding to bed someone is more likely than one would think. 100% likely, actually. Myoui Mina is the clear result of that. But that’s the thing, however. Nayeon hasn’t gotten drunk enough to sleep with someone _since_ Mina, and even then, she’s not particularly keen on the idea of sleeping with anyone else that _wasn’t_ Mina. As far as she knows, a couple bottles of soju should _not_ be capable of sending her to bed with someone.

Honestly, it feels like she’s just committed a crime. It shouldn’t, really, since Mina and her aren’t dating, but the dread that settles in the pit of her stomach is enough to convince her of so either way. She feels like crying for three days straight now.

Suddenly, the body on top of her stirs, and before she knows it, a pair of thighs bracket her hips as the other person pushes themselves on top of her fully to sit up. She squeezes her eyes shut and tries to shove her face into the pillow, begging herself to wake up from this terrible, terrible dream. Christ, her pillow even smells like Mina. She’s about to scream, really, because she shouldn’t be here and she shouldn’t have slept with anyone no matter how drunk she was, and Mina—

Mina! What would she even think of her? Probably as some stupid, cheating—

Or nothing. Because Mina and her? Not a thing. Mina probably wouldn’t even care. _Right?_ She can’t help it, however, worrying about what Mina would think even though she tells herself for the millionth time: they’re _not_ together. They’re not anything. It might feel like cheating (in some sense of the word) to Nayeon, but to Mina, it’s probably nothing. If anything, it serves as a wake up call, really: she’s out here sleeping with other people, and all she can think about, _still_ , is Mina. She might need to rethink this whole one-sided love thing. 

“What are you doing?” the girl on top of her asks quietly all of a sudden, sleep still heavy amongst her words.

Her thoughts scatter. _Jesus, Nayeon! You’re out here sleeping with people that sound like Mina too! Talk about having a type!_

“I’m,” she says, muffled, “trying to wake up from this dream.”

“Uh,” the girl says after a prolonged beat of silence, “okay?”

“Don’t get me wrong,” she continues talking into the pillow, “but whatever happened last night was a mistake. I was drunk and I didn’t know what I was doing and I’m sorry that you had to be apart of—“

“Nayeon,” the girl, still strangely sounding _a lot_ like Mina, cuts her off. Oh man, she even knows her name. Just how drunk was she last night? “What the hell are you talking about?”

It takes a full twenty seconds for Nayeon to register the other girl’s words. Then, another ten seconds for her move her face away from the pillow and open one eye to take a good look at who was currently straddled on top of her. 

Oh. 

Mina.

It smells and sounds like Mina because it _is_ Mina. 

Nayeon can’t even explain the wave of relief that crashes through her right that instant. She even thanks her drunken self from the moon and back for knowing better. Her smile is quick to turn sheepish as Mina stares down at her, lips pressed down into a line, seemingly unamused. “Oh, Mina, oh boy, am I glad to see you! Good morning!”

“… Right, morning,” Mina says, a brow raising at her sudden change in behavior. "You wanna talk about what that was?”

Of course not. Nayeon’s not even sure how to word what exactly _that_ was, anyway. It’s not like she can possibly say “so I woke up with this crazy ass headache and thought I slept with someone that wasn’t you and I panicked and was going to cry because it felt like I did the unspeakable but if I tell you, you wouldn’t understand because I’m in love with you when I’m not supposed to be and you’re not” without saying exactly _that_. Definitely not.

“Not really,” she says instead. "What I wanna do, actually,” Nayeon slides her palms up Mina’s exposed thighs, stopping when her fingers start toying with the ends of Mina’s awfully short sleep shorts, “is go back to sleep.”

“You know,” Mina smiles, just a bit, hands moving to press her palms flat against Nayeon’s tummy, “this feels a lot like déjà vu.”

“Really?”

“The morning after we first met,” Mina’s fingers fumble with the hem of Nayeon’s shirt, threatening to push it up just barely, “with the roles reversed and a lot more clothes on.”

Nayeon’s grin is cheeky. “Please tell me you’re not feeling waffles. I kept finding flour on my clothes for days, Mina. _Days_.”

Mina merely rolls her eyes as a response and Nayeon takes it as a chance to tug her down next to her, which Mina obliges without much of a fight. Easily, Mina tucks her face into the crook of her neck and there’s a hand that slides up her shirt, palm hot against her stomach. 

“Hey,” Nayeon says softly. Mina merely hums against her skin, tucks her fingers just barely underneath the waistband of her panties.

“Did I... do anything weird last night?” Nayeon asks out of the blue. Better safe than sorry. Nayeon’s drunken antics are rather infamous, ranging from trying to jump off bar counters to letting one Myoui Mina unceremoniously squeeze herself into her life like it was absolutely nothing. “Throw up in your flowers or something?”

Mina immediately goes quiet. Nayeon glances over, watches the way Mina seems lost in her thoughts for a couple seconds too long. Huh, she thought Mina would’ve understood her jab at her drunken habits. “Mina?"

Mina blinks, once then twice, before she burrows herself deeper into Nayeon’s side. Her hand moves to give the girl's side a squeeze, forcing a jerk and a bout of laughter from Nayeon. It’s quick to turn into a one-sided tickle fight all of a sudden, with Nayeon laughing and thrashing and snorting underneath her, and before they both know it, Mina’s right back on top of her stomach, hands pinning down her arms. 

“No,” is all she says, finally. She’s grinning down at her, but Nayeon can’t help that feeling that sprouts deep down in her heart. Like a wrong beat in the rhythm of things. It doesn’t feel right. 

“Mi—"

“You were just talking about your stuffed animals, _again_ ,” she cuts her off, bopping her on the nose lightly with her own. She’s still smiling, very much so gummy and everything so characteristic of Mina at ten in the morning. But here’s the thing:

Nayeon doesn’t miss the way it doesn’t reach her eyes. She doesn’t question it, however, and can only blame it on the fact that they’re up early in the morning instead of the afternoon for the first time in ages. That, or how Nayeon is possibly the dumbest person on Earth. Seriously. Like 60% idiocy and 40% water.

Instead, she nods dumbly and Mina promptly leans down to press a kiss square against her mouth.

It’s sweet, really, because morning kisses are _definitely_ a thing and it serves its purpose in making Nayeon’s heart puff up tenfold, but it’s also absolute hell because Mina has no idea what on earth she’s doing to her, has not a single clue of all the fires she’s setting alight in her heart, of all the mini Nayeons in her head, running rampant and wreaking havoc left and right. 

Honestly, Nayeon feels like an idiot. She’s an idiot for always thinking of how fucking in love she is with Mina and Mina? Mina isn’t, there’s no freaking way because Nayeon is Nayeon and a person like Mina isn’t the type to do charity shit like that, isn’t some copy-and-paste love interest out of every single cliche out there, where the classic “we sleep together and somewhere along the way I remembered that I have actual feelings and now they’re fucking everything up and oh wait, you’re in love with me too?” applies to everyone it sees fit. Her life is anything _but_ a movie. 

So, to wade off the thoughts, just in case her mouth works faster than her brain and she says something she _knows_ she’d regret:

“Ew, your breath stinks!”

-

Nayeon thinks. For a long time.

(Her? Thinking? She can’t believe it herself either, really.)

She thinks of how she even got herself in this mess in the first place, and how she’s always been so fucking weak against the prettiest girls. She might have to look into that. Anyways, here’s what’s going on:

Nayeon, who finally has come to terms with her feelings, is in love with a whole ass Myoui Mina. The same Myoui Mina that she had first met at least four cups of jungle juice in at one of Kim Jisoo’s infamous house parties, asked in the dumbest and drunkest way if she wanted to get out of here, and then well, the rest— you get it.

“I told you before,” Jeongyeon says, rubbing her temples. She feels like she’s said this a thousand times already. “Just tell her. In this day and age, people actually talk about this stuff, you know? How do you even think people get together these days?”

“It’s not that easy, Jeong!” Nayeon groans, flopping back onto her bed with the bravado of a fourteen-year-old. “This is Mina we’re talking about! I can’t just tell her that and then ruin everything between us. I don’t want that!”

“So you’re just going to pine after her for god knows how long?”

“Uh, yeah?"

“Look at it this way,,” Jeongyeon tries. Nayeon already knows she’s going to be anything but helpful. “The worst she could do is say ‘oh, sorry, I don’t feel the same.' Then you two can have like… a last hurrah and fuck it out or whatever you guys do.”

“And then _what?_ ”

Jeongyeon rubs the side of her head. “Uh, continue to do the things you’ve been doing like normal? I don’t know, I didn’t think this far.”

“So…” Nayeon deadpans. “You’re telling me that I should confess to her, like literally tell her I’m in _love_ with her, get rejected, but hey, that’s okay? We can just ignore the part where I’m so stupidly and irrationally in love with her and still just fuck around and act like nothing happened?”

“Yeah, that sounds about right,” Jeongyeon’s smile is sheepish when she shrugs. “To be fair, your… relationship, or whatever it is, with Mina is anything _but_ normal. I’m sure it’d all work out in the end."

 _This is exactly why we’re best friends_ , Nayeon thinks. _We’re both idiots. Dear God, nothing can save us._

“Jeongyeon,” Nayeon breathes through her nose. “Please never speak again. Get out.”

Jeongyeon only laughs, chucking the plushie in her hands at Nayeon’s head, and then moving to squeeze into the bed next to her. Nayeon complains, but nonetheless makes space. “It wouldn’t be surprising if that actually happened, you know?”

“I said get out.”

“Hey,” Jeongyeon ignores her. “What’s so hard about telling her anyway? I mean, you somehow worked up the balls to confess to Jennie and that bitch is _icy_ , dude. I still get shivers when I see her. Mina’s like… a marshmallow. A penguin-shaped marshmallow.”

“Mina’s just… different?” Nayeon tries. It’s not what she wants to say, really, but this will suffice for now. She doubts Jeongyeon will want to hear her drone for hours and hours about Mina.

“The only difference is that you guys just skipped the whole swipe right shebang _and_ the coffee date part.”

“Nuh uh, swiping right is mutual."

“And sleeping with each other first thing isn’t?”

Nayeon pouts. Jeongyeon pulls at her cheek harshly.

“Do you seriously think she slept with you… without liking you? She had to have liked _something_ , you idiot. Probably your face, but hey, at least it’s something.”

Nayeon only ignores her and sighs, trying to dig herself deeper into her bed and throwing her plushie over her face and screaming unintelligibly into it. Jeongyeon thinks she hears a “fuck feelings!” thrown in there somewhere.

 _It’s so obvious Mina likes you too, dimwit_ , Jeongyeon wants to say, wants to smack it square across Nayeon’s face, but the girl's not five years old even though she acts like it for christ’s sake! She can figure it out herself. She settles for ignoring Nayeon’s random screaming, already opening up her mobile farm game on her phone as she settles back against the headboard.

“Jeong,” Nayeon whines moments later, having enough of being ignored. “Do you really think so? That she likes me?”

“Stupid questions do exist after all,” Jeongyeon merely says. “But yes, I do think she likes you back. Actually, I _know_ so. It’s kinda super obvious."

Nayeon can only hug her plushie tight as she squirms around in bed. Jeongyeon can only sigh and once again ignore her.

“I think I’m scared,” Nayeon finally says after the longest while. “I don’t know of what though.”

Jeongyeon hums. Nayeon only continues.

“It just— It took me forever to get over Jennie. You know that, Jeong. I couldn’t… I couldn't even say her name for the longest time.” Nayeon groans, squeezes her plushie a little tighter. “And honestly? Some days, it feels like I’m not. I mean, I _know_ I’m over Jennie. It might’ve took months, but I made sure of it. It just… it feels like I’m not sometimes. Like I never will be.”

A beat.

“But then I think of Mina,” Nayeon scrubs at her face, even laughs a little, “and then it’s kind of like everything’s okay.”

The thing about Mina is that she’s… just _there_. Kind of like she’s meant to be. She’s the constant in Nayeon’s life that she didn’t know she needed, the one thing that fills in all the empty spaces of her life, and the different kind of warmth that sprouts within her heart.

It’s like free-falling without the guarantee of being caught in the end, but even then, that’s okay, that’s okay because that’ll always be the risk when it comes to Mina. It’s the rush, the adrenaline that spikes in her blood, the way it feels like gravity’s tethered the two of them together no matter what, and Nayeon can’t get enough of it. Had Nayeon believed in otherworldly phenomena, she’d coin this fate. (One-sided) soulmates or whatever you want to call it. If it had existed, then maybe this would’ve been it — how it just _feels_ like Nayeon’s meant to be with her, or how the only thing she wants to do around Mina is just fall and here she is: falling! For her!

Jeongyeon watches her, cheek rested up against the flat of her fingers. “Are you going to tell her?”

“… I’ll consider it.”

You see, no one knows Nayeon better than Jeongyeon. And Momo, but Momo’s not here right now, so she doesn’t get to be included. Nayeon likes to be vague at the wrong moments, but luckily, Jeongyeon knows this idiot like the back of her hand. She did the same shit with Jennie. Mulled over her feelings for forever even though it was literally obvious Jennie had the hots, if not more, for her as well. Though the situation is entirely different — Jennie was never a fuck buddy, but rather the object of Nayeon’s freshman year affections that continued for a good two years — Jeongyeon knows Nayeon can’t cope with her feelings well and always ends up doing the one thing she swears she won’t just to get rid of them.

So basically:

Nayeon's going to confess to Mina some way or another and it’ll be so cute and all that bullshit. Jeongyeon gets to win another bet, will be fifty bucks richer in maybe a week or two, and she actually likes Mina. (Don’t get her wrong: she _likes_ Jennie … but come on, that girl could turn anything into ice just by _looking_ at it.) Momo gets to lose another bet, will be fifty bucks poorer, but hey, at least she’s got a permanent dance buddy now.

And Nayeon will, quite literally, get _the_ girl. She wins the most out of all of them, honestly.

It all works out! There is no way Mina would reject Nayeon when Jeongyeon’s literally seen the way she looks at her (and wished she was blind afterwards) and all the couple-y shit they do but claim they’re not the one thing they actually should be and there is just absolutely _no way_ Nayeon can fuck this up.

Easy! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bro i am fucking DONE with this fic... make it end make it end make it END  
> letting everyone know that IDK when the next part will come out... we might be lucky if it'll be done by april lol
> 
> twt: @pikatzus


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